I recently had COVID. I quarantined up until I had two negative tests. Unfortunately, I have not recovered enough to return to work. This is due to my job requiring me to talk for 8+ hours a day and I can't say more than a few sentences without coughing so hard I nearly pee myself. This is on dextromethorphan (OTC) and benzonatate (prescription) cough medication. I visited urgent care to get the prescription cough med. However they will not help me with the short term disability paperwork.
A few notes:

• I am not looking for someone to lie for me. I would rather be working and the 40% pay cut sucks.
• I have health insurance (BCBSIL) however if the doctor will help with the paperwork but doesn't take my insurance, I can still afford to pay.
• I need the paperwork done by April 5th (found this out yesterday) and I haven't been able to find anywhere with an appointment available in time to submit the paperwork.
• Said paperwork is all electronic, so I can send it ahead and I am willing to do online or phone based appointments if needed or desired.
• I don't have a PCP because doctors are so hard to find here.

Any help is greatly appreciated.

This is partially a vent and partially some advice for the younger people I always see on here: Do whatever you have to do, right now, to get control of your own finances and get a job. Don’t be like me.
You don’t want to be like me. I’m 30 years old and still living with my abusive Nmom bc I can’t take being homeless again. Bc of the abuse I’ve never had a job for longer than a few months, and my mother controls my bank account. I can’t even see my bank account bc she controls it.
Not that it really matters, since I don’t have a job and nothing goes into it. I have a 5-year gap on my resume, which means I apply for jobs but never hear back. So another piece of advice: Never, ever get a gap on your resume. It’s basically the nail in the coffin for you ever being free.
There are so, so many resources for you if you’re 25 or younger. I know what it feels like to be so isolated by the abuse you don’t believe it, but I promise you it’s true. By the time you’re 30, nobody is going to care anymore. Use the resources available to you.
Today my mom told me she’s going to stop paying for my health insurance, and threatened to rehome my cat four days after I had to put my dog down bc of cancer. You don’t want my life. I don’t want my life. Get. Out.

Does anyone know if any FQ ear drop would come in contact with skin outside the ear could it penetrate into the bloodstream or is that unlikely? For example like a drop on your hand.
My son recently was prescribed Ofloxacin ear drops which I’m reluctant to give after being floxed badly myself. My wife disagrees after he had no issue with them prior. I’m also trying to be extremely careful not to get any near me.
Any insight to this would be awesome as I have no clue.

Awful Tier - Maps that I regularly back out of - ranked below a 4/10
Border Crossing - Overall 1/10
Theme - 4/10
Design - 0/10
Fun Factor - 1/10
6v6 - 1/10
10v10 - 2/10
This is legitimately the worst designed 6v6 cod map ive ever played. I would not care if they removed it from multiplayer and used it for other modes only like invasion where it actually plays pretty decent.
Museum - Overall 2.5/10
Theme - 8/10
Design - 2/10
Fun Factor - 2/10
6v6 - 1/10
10v10 - 6/10
Visually stunning, bright colors, good lighting, nice theme. Just way too big and a terrible layout. This map should absolutely not be in 6v6 but plays okay in 10v10.
Crown Raceway - Overall 3/10
Theme - 1/10
Design - 2/10
Fun Factor - 2/10
6v6 - 3/10
10v10 - 4/10
This one is just plain boring, ugly, and disappointing. A cool concept and theme on paper but executed poorly and is further ruined by horrible map design and atrocious lighting. Visually the worst looking map, so unfortunate what could have been a 9/10 theme is instead a huge weakness. For some reason everything is lit up to indicate that its night, yet the sky is still dark blue. Additionally the way they laid everything out is a travesty. Ridiculously long sniping lanes and cookie cutter interiors that make it feel samey everywhere you go. I wont play this one unless its 10v10, and its still mediocre even then.
Mediocre Tier - These maps are very flawed but I wont always skip them - ranked 4 to 6.5/10
Taraq - Overall 4.5/10
Theme - 7/10
Design - 4/10
Fun Factor - 5/10
6v6 - 4/10
10v10 - 5/10
Probably the most realistic map theme and design. Theres actually quite a few cool spots, map knowledge goes a long way here. This isnt shipment, you gotta play at a slower more calculated pace, mindlessly rushing everywhere will get you killed. Its not a great map but I like having a more open layout for variety.
Breenbergh Hotel - Overall 5.5/10
Theme - 5/10
Design - 5/10
Fun Factor 4/10
6v6 - 5/10
10v10 - 7/10
Im not as big on hotel as a lot of people seem to be, imo its the most overrated map in the game. I just cant get excited to play any mode on this map. Definitely some awkward sights and angles too, its not like they designed the place IRL with pvp combat in mind. Overall theme is okay but nothing special. Much better on 10v10
Al Bagra Fortress - Overall 6/10
Theme - 9/10
Design - 3/10
Fun Factor 6/10
6v6 - 6/10
10v10 - 5/10
Smaller size, cool theme, whats not to love other than the cheesy camping spots and the notorious spawn trap. The more I play this map the less I like it. I will say its not so bad for hardpoint and other modes outside of domination. Probably the hardest to rank because it plays so differently depending on the teams. I dont think 10v10 is an improvement on this map.
Zaya Observatory - Overall 6.4/10
Theme - 2/10
Design - 4/10
Fun Factor - 7/10
6v6 - 6/10
10v10 - 4/10
Ive actually never played Dome before so this was new to me. Not much of a theme here and its cluttered with junk randomly scattered throughout the map. A bit awkward to play, not a fan of the building chokepoint with the only other option being exposing yourself on the ladder route. Pretty terrible design but at least its small so there is plenty of action on 6v6. On 10v10 this map gets somehow simultaneously spammy and campy
Good Tier - Maps that can be great on certain modes but have inherent flaws that keep them out of top tier - ranked 6.5 to 8/10
El Asilo - Overall 7/10
Theme - 2/10
Design - 7/10
Fun Factor - 6/10
6v6 - 7/10
10v10 - 5/10
Pretty underrated map. There are sightlines for sniping but not enough to constantly be killed out of nowhere like Taraq or Musuem. The center building allows use of close range weapons. ARs and medium range split the difference. Hardpoint is a blast here if you play the objective. Yea I know its El Ass but honestly there are a lot of maps that play worse than this.
Zarqwa Hydroelectric - Overall 7.6/10
Theme - 7/10
Design - 6/10
Fun Factor- 8/10
6v6 - 6/10
10v10 - 9/10
One of the best looking maps with good lighting and beautiful water. The underwater passages are the x factor, allowing me to play this map differently from the rest and enjoy it for the uniqueness. Best for domination or hardpoint rather than TDM. If it was a bit smaller it would easily jump up a tier. Other than Musuem this map is improved the most by 10v10 and becomes top tier.
Great tier - I rarely have bad matches on these maps. Ranked 8 to 9/10
Shipment - Overall 8/10
Theme - 8/10
Design - 6/10
Fun Factor - 10/10
6v6 - 7/10
10v10 - na
I dont care what anyone says, this map is great for throwing on some music, having a beer or a joint, and just fucking shit up. Liking shipment doesnt mean you have adhd, you can enjoy the map and still appreciate slower paces of combat. A godsend for those of us who dont have much time to grind out camos or challenges. Design is better than previous Shipments, not much they can really do there with the size of the map. Best themed ship as well and the rain is a nice elemental touch. Just make it 24/7/365 already so I dont have to hear people constantly bitching about other people constantly bitching about not being able to play shipment. A 3v3 or 4v4 playlist would be a improvement over 6v6 imo, would be way less spawn deaths.
Embassy - Overall 8.4/10
Theme - 6/10
Design - 7/10
Fun Factor- 9/10
6v6 - 8/10
10v10 - 8/10
Very underrated map in MWII. Not too large, good verticality, lots of different sightlines that allow for gun variety. Lowkey the best map to get longshots. My favorite spot is the recessed corner right next to the tennis court. Just go prone and throw up a shield on your blind side. Theres a few cheesy window spots that prevent it from being a top tier map but still great overall.
Himmelmatt Expo - Overall 8.6/10
Theme - 9/10
Design - 8/10
Fun Factor - 9/10
6v6 - 8/10
10v10 - 8/10
The first original map added to the game, and it only took over 4 months. Some of the indoor areas of the map can be annoying, specifically the theater, but the rest of the map is top tier. I love diving in the pool while attempting trick shots and knife throws mid air. If you play to have fun instead of taking it too seriously its a great map. The theme and visuals are top tier as well and visibility of enemies is excellent.
Shoot House - Overall 8.8/10
Theme - 3/10
Design - 9/10
Fun Factor - 7/10
6v6 - 9/10
10v10 - 8/10
Is it overrated? Maybe a tiny bit. A nearly perfect map on paper, but it plays a bit too predictably, especially with all the camo grinders. Still a very good map with a good variety of sightlines. Little known fact : you can perch up on the rock climbing wall next to to broken cars if you sprint jump and even hop from peg to peg.
Top Tier - Maps that have no real flaws in their designs and work well for every weapon class - ranked above a 9/10
Farm 18 - Overall 9.2/10
Theme - 8/10
Design - 9/10
Fun Factor - 9/10
6v6 - 9/10
10v10 - 8/10
Nice overgrown post apocalyptic theme. Adequate size for 6v6. A great variety of guns from snipers to shotguns can be used effectively if you go to the right areas. Map knowledge is huge on Farm, theres a spot you can climb on inside the center building that has a direct sight on the slanted rooftop. Also a few lesser known ways to climb up certain places for unsuspecting counter plays. Top tier map, we need more like this.
Mercado Las Almas - Overall 9.5/10
Theme - 9/10
Design - 9/10
Fun Factor- 9/10
6v6 - 10/10
10v10 - 8/10
Visually the best color palette, great lighting, and more importantly the one of the best map designs. This map is made for 6v6. Small enough for plenty of action, big enough to allow various sightlines so any gun is viable. A good longshot alley that has enough cover to advance forward and have some good gun battles. Different routes available to flank with no major choke points. Some closer combat corners and small buildings for shotgun and smg users. My favorite spot is going prone on top of the RV and challenging opposing snipers down the alley. Good for pretty much all playstyles and game modes. Its not quite Highrise or Terminal but for me it ranks among some of my all time favorites.

This process has taken months. I have been trying to lose weight, everything failed. It was suggested to me that I should try CBT. I decided to twang a rubber band against my wrist every time I wanted food. I began with McDonald's, as I eat a lot of it living near one and working at a different one. Every time I thought of getting a McDonald's, or was eating a McDonald's, I would twang the band and inflict pain. It worked, and I associated the pain with McDonald's and stopped eating it! However, this also created a huge fear of the restaurant itself, and now I can't enter my workplace without extreme anxiety. This has obviously caused a lot of problems and I'm suffering with a lack of income. So there's my FU
TL;DR tried CBT on myself to lose weight and now I'm terrified to enter my workplace as I work in fast food

So I just gained courage to work on my mental health when I've known my whole life that I need professional help lol.
Some symptoms I have growing up are: 1. Anger and trust issues 2. Extreme insecurities 3. Egocentrism 4. Perfectionism 5. Constant anxiety over little things 6. Depressive episodes
It's a really long list but I'll save the rest for my psych session lol. Most people around me think I just have an attitude problem but I know I need help. I mean, I smacked my big bro's head HARD with a wooden CHESSBOARD when I lost to him at 5 YEARS OLD. I mock myself in my mind every single day of my life so I don't get hurt that much when somebody else insults me (still cries when someone calls me bida bida).
I'm not asking for a diagnosis here since I am aware that only specialists can give one. I just need tips on where to begin since a lot of people here already know what they want to get tested for (saw a lot of ops asking for adhd). If I consult with a psychologist, will they be the one to decide which test/assessment/whatever it is I have to take?
Also, any recommendations for psych specialists with affordable rates near Marikina?

I'm 25 years old and had 240 testosterone about 8 months ago. I am currently a patient with defy for the past 6 months. I'm in Boston Massachusetts and a quick google search shows about 20 mens TRT clinics near me. I searched because of all the DEA stuff but now this has me wondering, why did I ever use defy in the first place? I have all these clinics right near me. Surely one of these clinics has to be just as good right? Or is there something I'm completely missing here.

I'm feeling so alone in these feelings, and in learning how to manage new fears. I'm not sure if this is the right place, but I read the rules, and looked through the different support subreddits. If its not, then I'm happy to delete this post and look elsewhere. Is there a place for those that have experienced trauma from dogs? I grew up obsessed and in love with dogs, and in January I experienced something that has now made me feel terrified of them. I'm wanting to eventually seek help from an actual professional (insurance is why I haven't). But for now I want to read about what others have done to help themselves from a similar situation, and just to not feel so alone in my fears.
Is there a subreddit for living on with dog trauma? Or something similar?
I've thought of getting a ribbon/lanyard saying scared/anxious of dogs to keep on me while in public, because I now struggle going to places like home depot. I don't want to ruin dog friendly spaces for other people, because I'm still a dog owner myself, I understand how important that space can be. But I want to try and inform others so I do have panic from someone trying to walk down the aisle while I'm shopping from a spot. But I also don't want to avoid going to dog friendly places. There's so much new to myself that I'm still figuring out, and I still don't really understand what triggers me, or how to help my partner understand what I'm going through. We both experienced the same thing, but it hasn't affected him nearly as much as me.
Thank you taking the time to read this

I have only one self service car wash near me. It’s only for 5 min for almost $3! I start with pre-soak, soap, and then high pressure rinse… it looks okay, but not great. Is it necessary to towel dry (with a microfiber)… or is it okay to let it dry as you drive? YouTube videos all say something different, a lot of comments saying to stay away from pre-soak… What’s the best way to wash a challenger and preserve its paint and badges? Thank you.

I'm heading up to ski soon and I plan on camping overnight in my SUV. I've read about a couple of places to park at near town, but it's hard to know what's accessable/available right now. I keep seeing mention of camping on the scenic loop, but could somebody tell me exactly where people camp, and if those places are accessible?

So, i play on low graphics and normally everything runs smoothly. But once something like a Thermite, Molotov and that thing that slows you down, get's thrown i have horrible lag spike's. If the opposing team uses more than one of them simultaneously near me, i can't play at all.
Is there something i can do against it? My graphics are already on as low as possible.

These may be the rantings and ravings of a lunatic, but I’ve been stressing out lately and (like the good little auditor I am) document what’s going on….I’ll work late to make up the time and then I’ll eat it for dinner, I digress
This will likely be a stream of consciousness, so, forgive me if I ramble
I have anxiety, a lot of it, enough so that I take meds for it, but it’s really hard to explain how it feels…lots of you (probably a sad and shocking majority) know what I’m talking about right now, but you don’t quite know how to explain it….or maybe you can, but this is my breakthrough, so I apologize if it seems mundane, my hope is that my breakthrough could be someone else’s and someone else’s and so on….so bear with me, cause I think there will be a payoff and we all love a good ROI
I’m referring to that nagging feeling that after all the time and effort you put into the job and the mental anguish (dramatic much?) you could be fired tomorrow and get no notice…or at least that’s the feeling I have had every day that I went to work since my first day on the job
I knew it in my mind, but I never articulated it. For some reason, today, I chose violence (for the young kids we have here)….I decided to deal with it and say it out loud….I know that sounds fake and stupid….this is my Costanza moment where I do the opposite of what i would normally do and post about it for as many or few people as will see it…I don’t see the risk…ok, rambling
Things have been going well for me and my wife for the first time since covid, both of our jobs are great, she’s teaching a cake decorating class soon, her dream as a baker in training…I’m getting picked up for jobs in the future that I actually want to work on…you know what, maybe I won’t get fired today.
Or maybe I will for posting this on the internet on company time (that will be made up and eaten hundreds of times over….probably has)
But who cares, right, because, I’m a fucking asset (not asshat, for all you jokers), I don’t deserve to be fired, and I probably won’t
I know, look at me bragging, but seriously, I’m the guy that put on 100 pounds and nearly drank myself to death from stress and who knows what, I’m the last person to deserve this life…I’m 5 years sober, and I’m probably not getting fired tomorrow
And you? You’re probably not either!
Unless you deserve it, I can’t speak to that situation.
I hope you could make it through my stream of consciousness, and I hope you give yourself permission to pat yourself on the back….if you don’t think you deserve it, I do, so give yourself one from me

TeamDebits

I have been with my wife for nearly 10 years and married for 4. We have a toddler together. About a year ago she caught me sexting with someone from Reddit and was rightfully livid. I spent the following months seeking out therapy, attending a few meetings, and doing a little work in a sex addicts workbook. However, I always felt like I could control myself and the treatments were a bit overkill.
I was able to continue on this way for about 6-9 months but I stopped going to meetings, didn’t do book work and essentially just felt like I had beaten it. Eventually I slipped. And once I slipped it was right back down the rabbit hole. I kept trying to stop but I fell into a pattern of acting out for a day or two, stopping for 2-6 weeks and repeat.
Well my wife just caught me again. She is devastated and I am on the brink of destroying everything I’ve built over the past decade. I see that I am now powerless to simply float through life controlling things on my own and I am ready to go through real treatment to maintain my family. They are by far the most important thing in my life and to lose them over something so stupid is just incomprehensible.
Like many, I am feeling massive guilt and shame for my actions and the pain that I have caused. But it has awoken the seriousness of the situation and I am ready to do the real work to get myself out of this behavioral pattern and save what’s most important to me. I am on day 3 now and I know it will be a long road to regain her trust but you can only go one day at a time.
To be honest, I’m not entirely sure why I felt the need to post this but any and all help is very much appreciated. I guess it feels good to just put it all in words and own what I have done. Thanks again for any advice.

https://manabox.app/decks/36j4unFVQhy6RwECn-rrKA
TLDR: Suggestions on Flash/Instant speed "gotcha" cards in Esper colors.
I've built a deck that runs at essentially 100% Instant speed. All creatures are Flash, and nearly all other spells are Instant as well. The goal of the deck is to essentially sit back and be ready for whatever stupid BS cards my playgroup throws at me lol. So it's lead me to chase down all the best, most clever, most fun "gotcha" cards I can find. That said, I'm sure I'm missing some bangers! Help please! What are your favorites? Thanks!

I'm nearly 15. My brother is 13 and threatening to kill me. He pulled the knife again, I'd say, this is the 3rd time. I get blamed for his actions and my mom says I "antagonize" him. My mom tried getting him a therapist once but he refuses. He has severe anger issues, doesn't listen, rude & talks back, and extremely immature and says disturbing jokes, gets into trouble at school as well. Today he threatened to kill me and again days like these makes me not want to go home from school but I don't want to be in school either so I have nowhere to go. My mom is useless she doesn't listen to me when I say that he must have more than ADHD, he has a serious mental illness. No one is listening to me.

I'm a culturally mixed man. I was born in the Middle East to expat parents. My family and I moved to my father's hometown in Philippines when I was a toddler for few years, then to the capital city until I was 11 when I finally migrated to Ireland. I have lived in just one place for nearly two decades since then until I myself relocated to Ireland's capital city.
Now, don't get me wrong, I am not feeling out of place or anything. I'm proud of my multicultural background, I consider myself a cosmopolitan, I see myself as both Filipino and Irish, and I love travelling and have nomadic lifestyle (that's why I moved out after all). However, I have been thinking deeply about the nature of identity and self because of my experience. It's just surreal.
When I was in my previous city, which I would pretty much call my hometown now, I was accepted but I haven't really been seen as a local because I haven't fully adopted the local accent and also unaware of many local things for reasons too complex to write in this post. When some people in my hometown ask me where I'm from, I would say Philippines because my family is from there, even though I wasn't born there. Now I am in Dublin, when people ask me where I am from, I would say I am from my hometown in Ireland to make it simpler, but put a placer that I grew up there (since I still don't fully have an Irish accent and also clearly not being white). People see me more as from that part of the country where I grew and less as Filipino. But in my hometown in Ireland, they see me as both Filipino and Irish, but not quite Irish. I returned to Philippines for a holiday, and I have to admit that I have had some culture shock after being away for so long. And to be honest, I think culturally I would have hard time fitting again in Philippines if I settle back there because much of my sentiments have become Westernised. I met two guys who also travelled a lot and said they will probably also feel out of place or weird if they return to their home town/country again, saying it's not quite the same if one has been away for so long.
This experience made me think deeply a lot about the nature of identity. It reminds me of the Anime film "Ghost in the Shell", in which the main character's identity and body is changing all the time. Now I know what the main character feels about not having a fixed identity. It doesn't bother me in the slightest, but it's just a surreal feeling. It feels like you're in the air just hanging, but not floating or on free fall. I feel like going down the rabbit hole of philosophy on self and identity. But I am still struggling to finish reading a political philosophy book so I probably won't get around to it, lol!

I was playing a random skirmish 2v2 with AI ally and enemies. An average non-ranked leisurely game enjoyer. I tried the Last Man Standing option cause hey, must be fun to turn against your ally much like history has taught us all. Played a cool long game where AI ally and me battled it out with enemy AIs. It was an evenly matched hard AI game but since I grabbed 4/5 relics I had late game advantage, after I sufficiently held off waves of attacks. So as we were defeating the second/last enemy, I put a swarm of cavaliers and Rams around the ally’s main TC and castles, switched diplomacy soon as we defeated the second enemy and AI ally did a few default “how dare you” taunts and resigned in a few minutes.
Anyway this was so much fun, I decided to go again with another all-random skirmish, but with megarandom map this time. And to make it spicy, I also used sudden death mode. I got mongols (yay!) and ally was bohemians. Come castle age I’m rushing to get all the relics (success), built two castles to turtle up and protect main TC (success) and set up a bunch of military buildings and started queuing up an army. The bohemian ally seemed to be doing all the skirmishing (whatever go ahead) and I ignored some chats where one of the enemy AIs (lower in score and clearly under attacks) proposed becoming an ally for resources (no lock teams). Ally-betrayer me thought this was not fair at this moment to my original ally and rejected this alliance. The megarandom map being the weirdo that it is, the relic grab took some crucial attention cause it was in absolute treacherous locations near enemy towns and required monks being sneaky.
Now what I didn’t realize was I’d been ignoring the chat msgs/notifs a bit more while doing all the above to protect my town and satiate the greed of relic gold. Now the bohemian ally is suddenly in my town with a bunch of Hussite wagons. It’s already defeated the 2 enemies in sudden death. Okay no problem, I got castles to hold off while I create some counters. I have mangudais after all. Created a bunch of them to counter them and see that a bunch of rams and pikemen follow. Great let’s get some varied units in there to kill them off and avoid sudden death. I’m prepared for this. As I’m doing this I notice my units and buildings are getting slaughtered by arrow-immune wagons and pikemen and rams. Even my mangudai are dying. I clicked a bunch of my army units and started attacking the worst offenders near my TC, and that’s when I realized. The units just went and stood near the enemy units, taking damage and dying. By this time two castles fell down with the sound of my realisation that my diplomacy with him is still ALLY.
Try to repair main TC with surviving villagers as my units NOW start defending for real after I enemied him. Great, we’re clearing the town slowly. Oh wait, I see trebuchet fireballs raining down. Fuck this is embarrassing I better resign soon. Well whoops, too late, YOU’RE DEFEATED.

Got notice I passed in NC today with a 282 (154 MBE, 128 MEE) While I’m certainly pumped I figured I’d share my story to encourage those who haven’t passed yet or for some news they didn’t expect today. I graduated law school in 2013. I took the July 2013 exam and failed by 1 point. However, the crazy part was my grader refused to grade one of my essays. I had wrote the exam and he said my handwriting was too messy. Gave me a zero. No appeals allowed. No remedies at all. Everyone who has read my response later said it was a good essay. Should have been enough point to pass. But there was nothing I could do.
It took me nearly ten years to get over the stupidity of this. I moved on to other things and have run a successful business since 2014. I decided last year to finally give it another shot. I basically relearned everything I forgot since law school (most everything) on my own. I used BarMax for prep the last few months and finally got over the hump. If I can do it nearly 10 years out of law school, with two businesses, working full time and managing 4 kids you can to. Stick with it, it’s worth it.

My mom and I have had a rough history and I’m beginning to learn the emotional neglect and mental abuse that’s involved. I tend to “keep the peace” and don’t confront her words or actions as I’m afraid of losing her. My father is an abusive alcoholic (we are not in contact), and she is my only family left. I’m an only child with no external family - no aunts or uncles, never met my maternal grandparents and I’m in a surface level relationship with my paternal grandma.
When she makes snide comments or hurtful remarks I internalize them because I don’t know how to stand up for myself. When I have, I’m left with the silent treatment or boundaries are crossed anyways.
The other day, she made a remark that embarrassed me in front of a mutual acquaintance, then 20 minutes later crossed a simple boundary of coming over without letting me know. I work from home, I just ask that you give me a heads up you’re coming over.
She didn’t, and combined with the embarrassment from earlier - I absolutely lost my mind. I started yelling and crying about how her main goal is to embarrass me in front of others, she doesn’t see me as capable of doing anything, dismisses and compares my accomplishments to others, makes inappropriate comments about how I’m not “giving her grandkids”, makes comments on my weight (I have a chronic illness, it’s a struggle to keep weight on - it has been this way my entire life); I blacked out with rage and totally lost control of myself. Word vomiting specific experiences that she has no recollection of.
In our screaming match she was saying things like: “I’m sorry you feel that way”, “that’s not what I said/I never said that”, “I tell you you’re awesome all the time” (huh??) and other statements that just clarified how we’re not on the same page.
I am deeply ashamed and feel terrible, as I know I said very hurtful things. I sent a long text apology and said when she’s ready I’d like to try again and I’m on day 3 of silence on her end.
I moved to this city a few years back to be closer to her, with the intention of building back the relationship that I felt we never had when I was younger.. and I feel like I’ve just ruined it. I know I should have communicated my pain in the moment of those scenarios, but I get so flustered and can’t even think of what to say, so I stay silent. Which is why I’m sure this rage came out of nowhere for her.
I’ve been in talk therapy for ~5 years, recently found an emdr therapist to work through the deeper stuff. I feel like all the progress I’ve made just evaporates when I’m near her and I feel so guilty about the situation. Mainly needed to vent but I’m open to any and all suggestions on where to go from here. I’m really upset with myself for exploding and I wish I could take it back.

Feeling a bit frustrated, but maybe it's just because my doctor has only communicated with me about this over email. Cholesterol popped up high at my (30F) physical in January. She told me to "put down the burger and get off the couch" which...seemed harsh considering I'm not even capable of digesting red meat but whatever.
I did clean up my diet - no more processed food, cut way back on simple carbs, lots of veggies, nuts. Replaced white breads with whole grains, all the fiber my body can process (I have gastroparesis and most fats and fibers make me quite ill). I also upped my exercise (30-45 minutes of cardio 5x a week), and my endurance has gotten much better.
That's all fine. I miss bagels, but I feel better when I'm not bloaty and nauseous from the fiber. However I've lost 15 pounds which I didn't want. I'm once again underweight, my pants don't fit and my butt isn't nearly as cute. But fine.
Had follow up lipids panel after 8 weeks. Total cholesterol dropped from 269 to 219. LDL dropped from 194 to 153. Triglycerides and HDL slightly dropped, but both started out normal. I know I've got work left to do to get out of the borderline high range, but I was feeling pretty good about this progress in 2 months, since my research said 3 months was ambitious to control these levels without medication.
Doc commented on the results requesting a follow up appointment and was pretty dismissive of the progress I made. I get that lots of patients don't adhere to suggested lifestyle changes but I really tried my best despite her incredibly unhelpful guidance and I thought this was proof I was on the right track.
I'm fine with going on statins or whatever, I get this from my dad's side and they've all struggled with cholesterol despite being fit and healthy. I just wanted to do a sanity check before I see my doc again. If I'm just being a fat lazy American I'd like to know that going in, but otherwise I'm gonna find a less judgey GP to help me manage this in the future.

Greetings!
Currently, I'm studying for the ExCPT exam and I had the CPhT cert about 20 years ago. My original plan when I became certified again was to get a WFH position, but I've been thinking that I'd rather work outside the home. I'm stuck at home more than I'd like to be since I can't drive due to advanced retinopathy. I do have usable vision in my left eye, but my right eye is blind. My visual acuity is sitting at 20/80 currently, but there are a slew of visual issues the "good" eye is dealing with, too.
I want to work part-time since I'm also on disability. They have a cap on how much I can make before they cut off the benefits. Since I am working with Vocational Rehab, they can help me get aids to help me perform my job better, if needed. At most, I'll probably need some sort of magnifier to read fine to small print and wear a visor or hat depending on how bright the work space is.
I fear most of the potential issues may derive from the doctor visits, depending on what time the appointments are. Every time I visit my eye specialist, they dilate my eyes which hinders my ability to see for the rest of the day. The visits can range from once a month to every 3 months. I may be worrying about nothing, but the concern is real.
Basically, I just want to work and I'm always hearing how short-staffed the pharmacy scene is, so I figured getting my certification again would be an easy way to walk back into a job. I chose pharmacy not only because of the near constant need for techs, but I like technical work, too.
I know, legally, employers can't deny employment based on certain criteria, but I wonder how many other techs are working with visual impairments or other disabilities? And if any of you are in that boat, how do you get along with your employer?
TIA!