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2023.06.07 17:41 Ecstatic-Chocolate31 Aita for making my mother upset- edit

Hey! Sorry for not putting this with the original post, it wouldn’t let me for some reason, so i’ll put it here!
Edit; hey! I’ve been diagnosed with autism not soon after this post, and my father is still a workaholic, but we now don’t argue every time we see each other. (Which is because of family therapy)
He is still very pushy, saying i’m the ‘key’ for a ‘relationship’. I have told him since the beginning of the family therapy sessions that if he just left me alone, i’d stop being so annoyed. So, after a good 9 months (or so) of the shared therapy and my own solo therapy, he finally started leaving me alone and pushing me to do stuff, and then he started saying that i did ‘nothing’ to better our relationship, even though i’ve said to him to just leave me alone, and that he’s done everything and that is finally paid off, when in reality he just stopped pushing me to do stuff.
He pushes me to do stuff in a way that he won’t leave my room, and keeps standing in the doorway, repeating the same thing, always blaming me and showing the blame in my lap because i’ve ‘done something’ that i haven’t done. When i say get out, he doesn’t, and starts yelling his accusations, and then i start yelling to get it into his brain. Eventually he’ll start saying ‘can you yell any louder??’ And the only way he’ll leave me alone is if my mother comes home and stops him from entering, or calls him downstairs.
Now, lately i haven’t been feeling the best, i’ve become more depressed, but that’s because it’s summer, and my depression worsens around summer.
He once again stormed into my room yelling i’m the keg to a better relationship, and i once again remind him that i do not want a relationship with him, i simply don’t want to yell and argue every time we see each other.
He has started pushing me to do stuff again, not leaving me any room to retreat back to my own bedroom, simply barging in again when i am trying to sleep.
He complains about my school, just when my grades were going up again, and he starts saying he ‘loves’ me ‘so much!’, which i just want to barf at.
Everyone in my family (almost everyone) knows i hate it when people start talking about how much they love me, or appreciate me, or give me attention.
My father still refuses that there is something wrong with me, but whenever we get into an argument he’ll say i’m crazy and need to go to a mental hospital, or live at my grandma’s. (I agree)
I feel like i can’t recharge my social battery in my own home anymore, and i’ve been having trouble eating, and he’s been saying i ‘don’t need to eat’ because we have dinner in 2 hours.
Also, he has a leverage over me now, which he basically abuses because idk.
He had promised me a cat.
If i was neutral (he wouldn’t specify what that meant, and i needed to talk with my mother and him to clear up what he meant with that, because he refused to do that and kept saying ‘just be nice’) for 4 months, i’d get a cat, and he’d start taking his anti allergy pills.
I’ve wanted a cat since forever, and he was the only one in the house refusing.
I’m supposed to be done with the 4 months in the beginning of august, so 56 days left.
He does not care that i’m stressed because of the exam week coming up (my school puts all of the important tests in one week), and keeps threatening to restart the timer.
My mother is the only one that stops him, and he’ll yell at her too for taking my ‘side’.
I just didn’t want to argue and yell anymore, it was taking a toll on my mental health, and my brother is leaving elementary school end of this year.
Also, i do not like my father, everyone knows that, i tel him that he’s not my father at least once a week, if not 5 times a month.
I do know that i’m not a good daughter, and i know my father isn’t a good father.
I do not like him. And i do not want a relationship with him.
submitted by Ecstatic-Chocolate31 to AITAH [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 11:39 deathbygluten_ what would you say to an 18yr old girl trying to find her path in life?

*TW: SH, eating disorder, suicide*
TL;DR: my little sister is having a complicated and stressful transition to adulthood, i want to know what others might say to her during a time like this
apologies this is long but even if nobody reads it i had to get it all down somewhere, being the family therapist is tiring.
i’m 23 and big sister to the coolest, smartest, most gorgeous 18 yr old sister ever. our 16 ur old brother is the golden child, we both readily admit he’s way more chill and far cooler than us lol. unfortunately for my sister, she’s grown up with a pretty hard road of mental health issues, including multiple stays in behavioral hospitals, severe self harm, food restriction/anorexic tendencies, and several suicide attempts. she’s been in therapy from age 12, medicated since 13. recently she’s gotten in trouble for drinking at school and admitted to me that she’s smoking weed nearly every day. she also described to me stronger feelings of what sounds like DP/DR. if i could bear it all for her i would genuinely do it in a heartbeat.
here’s the thing. she’s got two weeks left of high school and has been working like hell to get her grades up to passing so she can graduate. she really wants this and i know she will achieve it, but school has always been hard for her so her emotions are all over the place with all this stress. it has also taken a toll on my family to help make everything happen in time for graduation—though i will say i’m proud of us all for how quickly and strongly we’ve each rallied around her despite our own plates already overflowing. we’ve been there for meetings with teachers, cops, and school admin, helped with catch-up tests, assignments, and homework, went to family therapy sessions with her reg therapist, as well as helping her thru a night of borderline alcohol poisoning… all in the past threee weeks.
tensions are kinda high with everyone because we’re all helping in so many ways to get her to the finish line (esp spicy btwn her and mom rn), and she seems to be in constant crisis about what happens next. our parents want her to live at home or on campus (20 min across town) and use the year of college they had prepaid for her when she was a child. it’s not so much about going to succeed or do well, just going to have tried it, to see if the experience is for her. she wants to move out on her own and start working immediately, but we’ve talked about how that’s not exactly feasible in our city—plus, she can’t drive yet so getting to a job is harder.
i just want her to focus on enjoying her summer, celebrate the win of graduating for a bit, then start the positive steps she says she wants to do that are good building blocks for any path, like get her license, find a part time job, practice managing her own money, etc. if she wants to keep working or try college it’s ultimately her decision and i know we will all have her back either way.
she’s just having so many struggles with purpose, identity, self image, self esteem, self confidence—more than i did, so i feel lost in guiding her… i just wish i could wave a magic wand and show her how awesome she is, how much better life gets once you’re out of the high school bubble and in a new setting. i tell her all this often but it doesn’t really stick—which i get, all that positive stuff sounded like a bunch of hooey to me at 18.
internet family people, what message do you think she should/would hear the most?
submitted by deathbygluten_ to internetparents [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 05:40 rawchel Went NC, but considering (and struggling) with all options. Would love advice

Hi RBB, where to start? I was mistakenly in RBN for a few years, but it's taken some introspection and more education to find my way here.
Any time I do post about my situation, I feel like I have to give all the context and that takes some time (probably engrained in needing to justify/qualify everything on a regular basis). but this is also a very convoluted chain of events so I apologize in advance for the length. For those who will jump to the TL;DR: Currently NC. Struggling with all the guilt of potentially never speaking to my uBPD mother again, so contemplating breaking NC to establish boundaries with my uBPD mother. Boundary definition is hard, and uBPD mom's behaviors are dissuading.


Family structure: My mother is a pwBPD, although uBPD. uBPD, as the two times we have done therapy as a family, she walked out as soon as the therapist suggested she was a contributing factor in any way. From the 4 subtypes, I shall anoint her the Hermit Queen - ranging pretty equally between both.
My father used to be an eDad, but they are in the middle of a 2-year-long divorce process, so he kind of could care less at this point what she does. Honestly, sometimes he still defends her, but for a lot of years, any criticism or the Cluster B's rolled off his back, probably because he was just trying to survive his own marriage. We'll stick with it because it's pretty truthful for majority of my life.
There are 3 kids: oldest (m36, split GC), middle (m33, GC) and me (F32 - likely BSC, although mainly just because I don't ever give into BPD tendencies than anything else. All the children have gone through our own bouts of rebellion). Both my brothers have really failed to launch tbh, and GC lives full time with parents, and SGC spends time there 50/50. HQ also uses money as a manipulation tactic, which can't work on me (living on my own/independently since 20).
HQ (hermit queen) has complained about her married openly to her 3 kids - really anything my eDad did that she didn't like - for as long as I can remember. I have blocked out a lot of my upbringing (unintentionally), but I could probably recount their marriage 'highlights reel' of offenses ranging from her birthday to christmases, to more birthdays and one-liners of inconsiderate comments she's repeated countless times to me, verbatim. I've been rooting for their separation for years, mainly so my eDad can be free, and so that I can stop. hearing. about how terrible he is. from HQ.
Therein lies the crux of my NC. I've taken the LC and VLC routes, without any formal announcements in the past, because her emotional baggage is so much. Any communication sucks her further in and she responds by inserting herself into the situation and then using her involvement as leverage to guilt me into 'spending time', or convincing herself she is unloved when I don't comply. Before going NC, I tried Grey Rocking a handful of times, which honestly only emphasized her emotional state because I was not contributing to the conversation with anything she could latch onto. That didn't work, so I attempted enforcing a boundary: do not talk to me about your marriage with eDad.
Seemed simple. Of course, nothing ever is. She would skirt around the topic tactlessly, "oh, sorry, you don't want to hear about that" and wait for my confirmation that, no, I did not, or reassurance to actively cross my boundary. It was pretty impossible for her to respect it, and exhausting for me to constantly ask her to.
Covid was sort a blessing in disguise in the sense that I did not have to see her (and of course horrible in every other way). I do struggle with guilt from being thankful for a shelter-in-place order due to a global pandemic, for a time where I was a fortunate to be able to work from home with my partner. But damn, it was so nice having a concrete reason (the only way she respects hearing "no") to why my partner and I would not come over for dinner, or 'stop by'. (If it wouldn't be apparent, my parents is absolutely not a fan of HQ.)
Planning family events or any 1:1 time leads to my second boundary I ever enforced - and she reminded me every time she she extended an invite: "I'm doing this to ensure you attend." - as if far enough into the future was the trick. (This was honestly my own doing, since I was very often 'busy' to avoid just telling her "no, I don't want to.")

Less-Historical History

(insert divorce)
After Covid, the very thin eggshell to which HQ and eDad's marriage was held together finally cracked under the weight. They both realized all the years they spent trying to repaisave/survive their marriage was fruitless and neither of them were willing to try anymore, and nothing was going to work. So they announced their intent to divorce to their kids.
HQ shared the "we still love you and want to be a family" approach with eDad. However, as soon as eDad was speaking to my siblings 1:1, HQ walked this back. She told me that this couldn't be further from the truth.
Insert flashback memory, right before one of my VLC stints, in which HQ shares that if eDad and her ever did divorce she would "take him for all he's worth". Real quote.She adamantly wanted to seek alimony (even if none of the kids were living with her,) because after x years of marriage, she would be entitled to it and she was accustomed to "a certain standard of living". She told me would make sure he would pay up for it and then some.
So, after the divorce is announced, I knew I didn't want to be around her very much. I couldn't possibly bear any more degrading of my father. I could not possibly support her further heightened emotional state of mind. The fact that she 'put on a happy face' for the family/announcement and it took her a maximum of two minutes to start bad-mouthing him only confirmed to me that she had not grown in since the time of her alimony epiphany (which at the time of the announcement was several years prior).
I didn't go NC right away. Any text exchanges had strings attached and guilt trips.
The timeline for the following events is pretty blurry, but it was very rapidly after the divorce announcement. HQ has felt like she has been held back with being married and unable to be her true self for many years. Somehow the family 'punished' her for being herself or having her own thoughts and opinions, so once she felt "free", she threw herself into dating. She did not share this with all of her children equally, as she tries to share the most selective information to the (perceived) least judgmental recipients, to paint herself in the best light. My GC brother informed me, because he was having trouble coping and he needed someone to commiserate with. Honestly, at this point I was fine because I wasn't around it. It wasn't like she was trying to interject ...whoever, into my life/to meet the kids.
However, she was being particularly needy - I would spend time with her and she would vent about the divorce. It was draining - so I told her, I didn't need a reply, I acknowledge she is going through a hard time, and that I want her to be happy, but I needed some space to figure out my boundaries, to reach a point where we can have a healthy relationship, so would appreciate some space from the divorce situation, which included her. She did not reply.
Seems simple? Straight forward? Agreed upon? Never. She took about a month to reach out after that, to have me refer her new boyfriend to the company I was working at. She didn't tell me who it was, and she's tried to refer friends through me before so it wasn't actually that out of the ordinary. Something felt off, especially with the timing so I checked the name with my GC, who confirmed she was trying to refer her new bf to my company. I was livid, and didn't hesitate to tell her my reaction. I was calm in my message, and reiterated my ask for space, and that her actions felt very manipulative.
She took zero ownership, and basically tried to say I was making it complicated. She never acknowledged it was her bf, which she stands by to this day to claim she didn't do anything wrong in that situation. She tried to rationalize why she was dating, missing the point entirely.
She kept sending random texts:
  1. 'Fond' memories of me as a child, which was a situation where I was misbehaving (with good intentions) as a child, and how she admits she handled the situation poorly. (Somehow a talk with my GC convinced her this was something I was still harboring against her.)
  2. Apology surrounding the events of how I left home (in which she has both made herself the power-holder as well as the victim in that situation). As I recall the events, yet another screaming match had escalated so far that I couldn't handle it any more - I told her I would be moving out, packing my shit immediately and leaving. She was furious and basically agreed in the heat of the moment - but and remembers this as "kicking me out".
  3. (With the former message) she also apologized for "sharing her relational distress" with me, and for the "undue anxiety, grief, and stress", and then promised to be a better listener.
  4. Random, random articles, without any context to them.
I responded to none of them, since I had asked for space!! (This just seemed to spurn her on.)
Finally, it came to a breaking point. I started it actually, by accidentally calling her. It rang for less than a split second and I hung up. She tried to call me back a few days later while was on a work trip, (so, traveling,) and on a call with my therapist. Somehow the software answered (it wasn't like a phone call, it was a video call, but not Zoom). I quickly hung up, but it was connected for like a second.
Very, very unfortunately she had also recently underwent a third or fourth surgery for a repeat medical problem (that honestly would resolve, if she listened to doctor advise - confirmed by a doctor!), so she texted immediately her favorite tactic: guilt. "I thought you'd call back after you woke up but no, so guess your initial call was a butt dial now, not concern for me after my recent knee surgery. Sorry to bother you, take care."


Ok we're caught up now. This is where I go full NC. The passive aggressive response (very typical) was not necessary, and without her knowing my situation, she jumped to conclusions - again. I spent a lot of hours writing the text I sent to her, owning my inability to enforce my boundaries, and reiterating them to her - acknowledging once again the struggle she is going through and my hope for her happiness, and eventually reaching a healthy point in our relationship. I reiterated my ask for space, but putting a timeline on it this time: when the divorce gets finalized. I set a clear expectation, that I would reach out when that time comes to reopen the lines of communication. The divorce is still not final, if you are wondering.
Without having this wonderful piece of advice:
You could do everything "right" and they still may be unhappy.
I agonized over that text for basically 24+ hours. I got friends and GC to proofread. (I event read it to my therapist after - they were very impressed! Woo!)I didn't ask her not to reply, if anything I was fully expecting another convoluted, missing-the-point response, but nothing. She hasn't actually texted/called me since. She has not hesitated to complain about my, harbor over "where did I go wrong" to my brothers, to her sisters, except to me. She's done just about everything except: read my last (few) texts. I literally laid it all out for her.
All the pretty words I said to her ("I want to figure out my boundaries"), while true, have been a placeholder to basically buy myself time. It's been 2 years. 2 years should be enough time. But, I've been putting off just... hashing it out with myself. Little bit of a Schrödinger's Cat situation. I know (...sort of...) what I want, but: if I never vocalize it, I don't have to feel bad about it. I don't have to acknowledge that it affects the relationships with the rest of my family. I love my brothers, no matter how failed-to-launch they are, they went through a similar family dynamic. They are funny, interesting weirdos that I don't want out of my life. My (no longer e) Dad is an amazing person, we've built a much stronger relationship over the past few years, and I don't think it would fully jeopardize my relationship with him, but he knows where I stand with HQ and he suggested I wish her happy mothers day this year. He still cares for her, as a fellow human being that he spent many years of his life with.
Fun little side note: HQ also went years ignoring her siblings/parents because her own dad was basically an Nparent (undiagnosed, racist, bigoted, not good person. Only after he passed, did I meet my grandmother or my cousins on her side. (I still haven't met everyone on that side of the family. I am sure she thinks I'm going to do what she did to her own family, which is why I got random apology texts.))
What I want versus what I don't want is a lot easier to define. (Admittedly, I don't really know how to reverse-engineer those for boundary establishing.)
These past 3-4 years have been amazingly, saddeningly wonderful. It's breaking my heart to admit that, y'all. But it's because she wasn't actively in my life.
When I think about the future with her in my life, I'm sort of paralyzed. I can't imagine getting married and trusting her to stay out of the wedding planning. I can't imagine eventually having kids and trusting her to babysit. I can't imagine her ever not dropping comments about any relationship I am in, comparing it/them/fights to hers with eDad - warning me not to make the same mistakes she did. I genuinely can't even imagine asking her to respect my boundaries and having her do so.
GC tells me she is improved, she's open to feedback and capable of growth, but he's been working with heon their relationship since he's been living with her. (Especially since after the divorce & eDad moved out, it's been mainly the two of them in the house.)
I am not as confident. I can't parent my own parent, I should not have to teach her how to be an adult, how to have a normal relationship with her own daughter, and constantly constantly tell her what is ok/not ok (in regards to my boundaries). I am exhausted just thinking about it.
This community seems so helpful and honestly just sharing my experience was kind of cathartic, since my partner doesn't really understand my complicated feelings surrounding my family. He came from an incredibly "typical" upbringing.
The right to live free from emotional and physical abuse
is very empowering, and ...logical. But I am still struggling with all the guilt of potentially never speaking to my mother again.
I would truly love to hear if others have gone through something similar. How do you deal with the guilt? Or how do you deal with the regular toll of parenting a parent? I'll take setting boundary advice, too, lol.
If you got this far, you need a medal for reading my essay. Thank you.
TL;DR: Currently NC. Struggling with all the guilt of potentially never speaking to my uBPD mother again, so contemplating breaking NC to establish boundaries with my uBPD mother. Boundary definition is hard, and uBPD mom's behaviors are dissuading.
submitted by rawchel to raisedbyborderlines [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 05:33 Otter_bot45 WIBTA if I went to court against my father?

Hey THT! This is my first Reddit post so forgive me if it’s a little awkward. There’s a long story behind this but basically as the title said I’m considering taking my (18 F) father (50-something M) to court for sexual assault. To give context I’ve grown up in a family of four (me, mom, dad, brother) for my whole life. My mom and dad never seemed to have any major conflicts and life seemed good. That is until when I was 17 my mom found out that my dad was cheating on her from women from his hometown and tried to get him to go to therapy with her to work it out. She didn’t tell my brother and I about this because she was trying to protect us and keep our family together. Several months after she found this out (July of 2022) my dad and I were chilling on the couch together and I was drifting in and out of sleep while he massaged my lower legs. He and I had always had a more physical relationship so this wasn’t a really weird thing- or at least I didn’t think it was until I woke up and saw him touching my very inappropriately. I didn’t know at the time that what he did was actually sexual assault but it in fact was (although it was mild compared to stories I’ve heard from others about their experiences so part of me still questions whether or not what he did was that extreme but others have told me it is so I guess I’ll believe him). Anyway, my mom got him kicked out within the week and it’s been a year of processing and healing for my mom, brother and I. In the process too we also realized how toxic he was and how emotionally abusive he was towards my brother. I’ve tried to stay away from him as much as possible but throughout the year he’s kept contacting me via email and letters and voicemail from anonymous phone numbers. I have his number blocked but not his email because one time he emailed me wanting to come visit me on my college campus and I had to get campus security and the police involved and I’m scared that he’ll email again and if I don’t respond he’ll just come without notice. I’m so sick of him contacting me and the people I care for and he has been explicitly told verbally from my moms lawyer not to contact me and he still kept contacting me anyways. I am so sick of how much anxiety it causes me every time he does this and so I see no other choice than to go to court against him to try and at least get a restraining order or something, but ideally get him charged for sexual assault. I’m still very conflicted about it though because of the toll it could take on my mental health (which was kinda crappy before all this began anyways). Sorry if this was kinda spotty but I just don’t know what to do anymore and I could really use some advice. Thanks so much <3
submitted by Otter_bot45 to TwoHotTakes [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 04:39 bananamf1234 Do i have the right to be mad? TW sh, sa, ed, suicide

My family has 5 people. dad M48. Mom F45 Brother 20, my sister F16 and me f14. My whole life my siblings struggled with their mental health. Tw Sh, eating disorders, suicide, and sa. my brother used to be on the bigger side, and he developed an ed and stopped eating, he also tried killing himself multiple times and possibly self-harmed (not confirmed) he is also transgender which gives him body image problem. My sister also developed and ed and me and her were both in a sport that required us to watch what we eat. she also struggled with sh and i was the first one that saw it and i told my mom but at the time i was only 10 and had no idea what it was. she recently got possibly raped (she was unconscious but he did other things to her) he was 18 and she was 15. This obviously had all eyes on them and not me. i started sh at 11 my mom found out and was like "oh did u see ur sister do it" i didn't want to show the cuts to my dad and he said "if you can cut it you can show it" ive had many problems with my dad. when i was 8 i told him i was insecure and he laughed in my face. he would always compare me too my sister. and has said some extremely transphobic things to my brother. and overall has anger issues. When i started therapy, my mom admitted she took my signs of mental illness and my sh lightly because she thought i was mentally ok and paid attention to my siblings. speaking of therapy, she's always talking about my sister in MY therapy sessions. "are u ok with everything happening to ur sister" "well what happened to ur sister must be taking a toll" "oh well this also happened to ur sister" just things like that ive been struggling on and off with sh and my eating disorder which are always getting compared to my sister and brother. "oh, you don't want to get as bad as them" "urs arent as deep" and things like that. In my most recent relapse my mom said "maybe i should start cutting myself to" i flipped out "why would say that" she kept on talking and i told her to leave. I told my sister about this. She has told me that she heard my mom saying me and her are the reason she wants to kill herself. She also cut herself infront of my sister to test out if it was sharp enough. I dont think my brother knows about this since he moved out. ive been mad at my mom for the past 2 weeks and we have been arguing alot. do i have the right to be mad?
submitted by bananamf1234 to family [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 04:30 United_Efficiency330 When Haddie called Max out

I have made ZERO secret on this subreddit that Haddie is my favorite character in "Parenthood." If I had to pick a moment that officially cemented her as my favorite character, it would be the scene in the episode "Missing" from Season 3 where she chews into Max for running off without telling anybody. Sarah Ramos (Haddie) and Max Burkholder (Max) both did a tremendous job with this scene demonstrating that they understood their characters and their motivations well and why they would act that way.
In this episode, Max expresses a desire to visit the local science museum to see an exhibition on dinosaurs. Originally he was supposed to go with his father and until the day before that was the plan. Unfortunately for him, both Adam and Kristina cannot go due to work obligations. Max, like many children on the Autism Spectrum (and sometimes teenagers and adults) absolutely cannot stand change. Especially relatively last minute change. In desperation, Kristina and Adam ask Haddie to watch Max claiming "you are the best at babysitting Max" (being the sole member of the immediate family who doesn't coddle Max certainly helps with that). Haddie reluctantly agrees to after extracting a promise that Max will allow her to study.
The following day after Kristina and Adam go to work, Max now alone in the house with Haddie, still seems incapable of accepting that he won't get to the museum that weekend. He barges into Haddie's room in a vain attempt to get her to take him there instead. Haddie who is busy studying for exams (she is in her senior year of high school here) is doing her level best not to lose her temper with him. Even when he is telling her they can find public transportation to get there she continues to tell him no and orders him out of her room. She is relieved when he's finally out of there. After about an hour, Haddie comes out of her room, only to find Max has left without telling anyone. She is both angry and scared.
After a series of events where Haddie calls Adam and the two of them finally managed to track down Kristina, Kristina returns home only to find that Max was found in Oakland by the local police having gotten onto the wrong bus and misunderstood the directions. He arrives back at the Braverman house seemingly pleased with himself, "I got to ride in a cop car." Kristina and Adam won't confront him on what happened, but Haddie won't hear of it. Hence where the scene begins.
Incredulous that neither Kristina nor Adam will even talk to Max over his actions, Haddie decides to take the matter into her own hands. Ignoring pleas from Kristina to "let him be" and "he's been through a lot today", as Max walks toward to house to "feed (his) lizard" Haddie calls for him to "stop." Without missing a beat, Haddie quickly looks back at their parents, turns around and asks Max "do you understand what happened today?" Max of course misses the point and says that he "wanted to go to the museum." Haddie, standing there with her arms crossed then makes it clear to Max that the three of them "had to spend our entire day worrying about you and wondering where you are." Max, still missing the point repeats that he "didn't get to go to the museum." Haddie clearly frustrated about what happened and Max not getting it asks him if he gets that and he cares? Getting no response from Max and clearly angry, Haddie says "no you don't care, cause you never care." Haddie then tells him with a rising voice "Max, you have to think about other people. You only think about yourself." Frustrated and saddened Haddie asked "what am I supposed to do.....why don't you think about anyone but yourself?" Haddie with tears in her eyes says "we try so hard to make things normal and it's just not!" With that last point, Haddie enters the house and closes the door. Max, clearly STILL not getting it then asks Kristina and Adam "is she gonna get in trouble for yelling?" With no answer, he then says "I'm gonna go feed guacamole" and goes inside. He leaves Kristina and Adam outside still frustrated. The scene ends.
What makes this scene so great and powerful is that both Sarah Ramos and Max Burkholder absolutely nailed their characters' personalities there. Max clearly doesn't think what he did was wrong and doesn't understand why Haddie is chewing him out. All he seems to care about is that Haddie yelled at him, therefore "consequences." Haddie clearly is upset not only because Max ran away without telling her or anybody but the fact that he is at best indifferent and at worst oblivious to what she is telling him. This has clearly taken a toll on her.
In addition, Haddie clearly is of two minds when she calls Max out. Firstly, she is doing so as a loving and caring big sister who was and is genuinely scared and worried about Max running off to a dangerous part of the Bay Area (he ended up in Downtown Oakland) that he isn't familiar with. She doesn't want Max to get hurt or killed. Secondly, Haddie is a driven, intelligent, ambitious young woman who has spend the bulk of her life in Max's shadow. She is genuinely frustrated about the fact that for essentially all of Max's life, her wants and needs have come second or not at all to his. While she was and is anything other than surprised that Max is on the Autism Spectrum (when the show first premiered in 2010, Asperger's Syndrome still existed as a diagnosis) given that she saw the warning signs very early in his life - frankly just about ANY child would be both hurt and traumatized if a sibling knocked over their 10th birthday cake - and she is more understanding of Max than just about anyone in her situation would be, the hurt is very much still there.
Although she is not always patient with Max and gets angry with him at times - as she did here - Haddie has ALWAYS had Max's best interests at heart. As a person with Asperger's Syndrome who had many of Max's social difficulties growing up (albeit not to his extreme), I NEVER, not once felt that Haddie hated him or was even mean spirited towards him. I have always seen in Haddie someone who genuinely loves her brother no matter what and who wants him to succeed and thrive in life and in a word that even in 2023 truly does not understand Autism. As a person who truly believes - and NOT solely for personal reasons - that people on the Autism Spectrum and people with disabilities should be as part of mainstream society as much as possible, there is no better demonstration of love and affection than that. Because of those factors, Haddie has always been my favorite character in "Parenthood" and I wish she got less flack than she does.
submitted by United_Efficiency330 to Parenthood [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 04:12 possessionfc PLEASE HELP ME get my depressed cat back to herself again 😢

My cat has been depressed for 30 days. She is almost 15 years old and was my families cat. I recently moved out of my parents house and I took her with me as I am her biggest companion and who she takes a liking to the best. Since the move, she has completely stopped eating her routine dry food that she used to gobble up daily. She is plus size so she would eat large volumes of it when living at the old place. She has not been given wet food for years because she likes the dry food so much and it was vet recommended to combat frequent UTIs she would get years ago (hasn’t had one of those in 6 years.) Since she wasn’t touching her bowl of dry food I had to start buying wet food to try entice her. Some flavors she completely ignores, however she has eaten a few licks here and there of a couple of flavors. This cat used to literally scream-meow at everyone in my house when her bowl was empty until it was filled. So it makes me feel incredibly guilty that since the move she barley eats anymore.
I waited a couple of weeks for her to acclimate before I brought her to the vet. Despite clearly not eating anywhere near what she was eating before the move, vet says she is 100% fine based on blood tests and some physical exams and that she is actually in better shape than most cats her age.
I don’t know what to do. I keep trying different flavors of wet food to see if anything sticks, but nothing has. I am at work 5 days a week, so I think her being home alone in a new environment without 3 members of my family she used to be around, is really taking a toll on her mental state. But I have to work and can’t be home with her 24/7. She doesn’t seem in pain, just seems sad and uninspired to do anything and has her spots in the house she likes to sleep. Does anyone have any advice? She doesn’t like toys, she was stimulated by cat nip a few days ago but now seems uninterested in it. Part of me thinks she should move back to my parents to live with them and my brother, since she was so happy there. But then she won’t be with me whom she is attached to more than them. I am at complete loss and feel guilty that she’s not acclimating well. But 30 days is a long time to be barely eating. She also is only having a bowl movement roughly every 5-7 days which is obviously way less frequent than it should be.
PLEASE HELP ME GET MY CAT BACK TO HERSELF. I feel like a terrible pet owner for putting her in this position and need ways to get her feeling happy again.
submitted by possessionfc to AskVet [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 02:18 Intel81994 Crypto Ruined My Life and Career - Why I Became ANTI Crypto

Crypto user since 2014, not a noob. Started working in crypto in 2021 professionally - PIVOTED career to industry.
Worked for a major financial publishing firm (publicly traded) covering crypto for investment research.
Got most of my savings hacked via a crazy computer intrusion, Feds got involved, couldn't help, mental health went to complete shit, VERY dark days, almost 6 figures stolen.
Found out it was a vulnerability in a certain wallet that led to a data breach of my computer (not phishing like usually how people get hacked), but the amount stolen is apparently too small for attorneys to even take the case or try to prove.
To this day, no updates on the funds from the Feds.
Had heavy depression and even more fucked up at times. As you can imagine, if someone like me who is sophisticated can get hacked and completely lose it all with ZERO recourse, this ruined my entire idea of the industry and thereby fucked my career up mentally as I could hardly work in crypto without having PTSD.
I was in hell, had to sell my car to survive and pay rent.
Then, 2022 happened. Luckily I was too mentally screwed up to buy any crypto since 2021 so I stayed out of the market with any buys. The people in my firm kept shilling crypto and buying themselves...
Voyager went belly up, lost more there that I had stored but not a huge deal wasn't too much, only 6k or so and may get half back it looks like. Oh well, my fault. But they lied about FDIC insurance.
Luckily avoided FTX save for $500 dollars worth. Now saw the Atomic wallet hack this weekend... sad but obvious it was bound to happen. Not affected luckily. Many more such hacks and exit scams may be coming as market gets worse and macro stays bad.
To prevent my hack I would literally have had to have a compsci PhD from Stanford and then cybersecurity training. What the fuck?
And we want mass adoption and everyone to put their 401k into self custody crypto? There is a reason we use custodians, with armed guards, and insurance, and regulation.
Then, lost my job in the industry 3 months ago due to the market being shit and rate hikes. Saw it coming. But I didn't realize that being affiliated with crypto must be some sort of black mark on my resume?
Tech industry feels bad for me, the finance industry thinks it's a cute joke. Worse than being affiliated with Lehman Brothers or working in porn industry.
No one tells you hey kid, there is a serious career risk/political risk/person risk (kidnapping/violence) of working in crypto industry - but there is . It's clear where things are heading.
Maybe DOJ charges against Binance next. I interviewed with Binance last year when I was applying around. Also with Coinbase. Maybe dodged a bullet.
Can’t take the risk now. Unfortunately looks like industry US stateside has contracted sharply due to macro, layoffs likely to get worse, regulatory pressures - have to pivot industries in this economic environment.
Unfortunately my experience has shown me that crypto is mostly useless now except for crimes and actually it’s a major security risk for everyone / national security. Imagine if people across the country get mass hacked what that does for society.
Speculation is net negative for society. Meanwhile let's recount what good has crypto led do besides a few remittances and refugees being able to carry funds?
I don't know what to do to get my funds back since it's been over 1.5 yrs, this vulnerability was covered in the press so I could try to ask the wallet company to compensate my 75K + the 15K I spent in therapy from being so fucked up over it.
I think this incident caused some form of PTSD and there is zero mental health help for it. It's enough to destroy lives and could have killed me.
Not because it's much money long term, I've heard of people who lost far more but there is something extremely intrusive about a computer intrusion hack and never being able to trust anything.
I feel OCD compulsion to check all bank accounts multiple times a day and have flashbacks still and sometimes nightmares, no idea what to do to get past this. It's taking an extreme toll on my mental health still.
Honestly it's caused me to hate crypto. I now plan to write to my senators to ban it ASAP (**joking... not doing that) and I will get compensated one day for this + many more thousands of dollars for the mental anguish + therapy costs + lost time and wages.
If this sort of thing were to happen to others - some would either kill themselves or we'd have society wide turmoil. I wonder how many people offed themselves after FTX and Luna. Or Atomic. It doesn't deserve mass adoption in its current form - no way.
Funny that Coinbase thinks US not allowing crypto is a national security concern. I believe crypto is a legit national security concern.
Before someone victim blames me for exposing seeds or not using a hardware wallet (I have one, it was fine, my exchange accounts were fine).... FYI Metamask was caught storing seeds on the local drive and exposing them plenty of times.
This wasn't some DeFi rug pull or me being a degen. It was pure intrusion caused by a vulnerability in the wallet, it's a double felony as per DOJ to do that to a computer. No one deserves nor should expect to have an INTRUSION. Getting phished is very different and somewhat worthy of shaming someone for being a dumbass.
Now I have to pivot industries to survive, if I somehow land a crypto role now I would probably get laid off again because rates are staying higher for longer and I believe more dominoes will continue to fall for a while, and I can't afford another layoff anytime soon, due to this.
Honestly at this point IMO you have to be mentally ill to keep buying crypto. UST's yielding almost 6%, corporate bonds almost 12%, not to mention the capital gains in bonds one can get when rates drop.... why would you keep buying crypto? Yield is a function of risk, never forget.
Oh not to mention your bonds and stocks won't get hacked. And if they do, you're insured (SPIC).
I don't care what I have to do, if it's get the press to talk about my hack, or get CFPB to act, or DOJ. I don't give a shit.
I went to a top public US uni, am extremely hard working and sharp, and there is no reason I should be in this position in my late 20s due to this shitstain industry full of grifters and criminals.
First gen American immigrant, grew up lower middle class, can you imagine getting robbed of what your mom would have spent 3 years of working on a visa alone while dad stayed back in home country? Talk about punch in the gut.
P.s. To NFT grifters or influencers making shitcoins to rug people: AI (decreasing cost of compute, labor) + advancing forensics/ KYC + immutable public ledger aka blockchain will make it possible to retroactively charge criminals for the foreseeable future. Most low IQ move ever. Better to raise $ off the blockchain and flee to Dubai.
Ironically, to commit crypto crime today, you have to be so bearish on tech/ the future to think you won't ever get caught. Definition of spazzed out short term thinking TikTok brain.
submitted by Intel81994 to CryptoCurrency [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 01:31 Nevoy_92 Book of Sayings - First Contact Anthology

This is a shout out to everyone who enjoys and has followed u/ralts_bloodthrone with First Contact. The author and users own all associated works.
I have gone through the first 50 chapters and picked user comments that fit with the flow of the narrative and were posted within the time frame of the original post. Effectively I am creating a Book of Sayings and "History" taken from the perspective of the people throughout the Journey/ u/ralts_bloodthrone if you find it fits into the narrative of chapters 960+ feel free to use!
I have included, to the best to my ability, the user who posted the comment and the associated chapter it was pulled from. Additionally I have juggled with the order to make a better fitting Narrative. I plan on compiling similar books/chapters for various story arcs and significant characters individually.
***I'm reposting since my last edit resulted in loosing all the contact and getting it removed. Hopefully it works now!***
It was unknown who compiled the first thoughts, who began writing the Book of Sayings. What is known is that it captured the words of the Mad Ones, of the Terrors, of their Enemies and Friends. Some of what has been recorded is pure nonsense and unbelievable, yet there it is repeated with consistency with such belief there must be some truth to it. Otherwise the whole of the universe must have been absolutely Mad... - Preface of Chapter of Opening - Book of Sayings Unknown Historian
Terrans- Terrors- The Mad Lemurs
  1. "The Terrans are riled up."
------NOTHING FOLLOWS----------
u/Mr-Sphene ch 13
2.The terrans of the future will never, ever confirm or deny which of the rumors and stories about Terra's past are actually true.
u/Admiral_Dermond ch 52
3. A happy human is one that is sitting on its butt, eating donuts and boogers. An unhappy human will quickly, effectively, and efficiently destroy whatever is making it unhappy, so that it may return to sitting on its butt, eating donuts and boogers.
u/Khenal ch 32
4. So not only did the Mantids destroy Earth, but they made every human experience the destruction first-hand and gloated?
Yeah. Fuck those guys.
5. That's when they made the biggest mistake of their ugly lives.
u/5thhorseman_ ch 24
6. Hurr Durr I'm a human! I get a hard on from war and people just love to pick fights with me!
u/Mr_Sphene ch 31
The Calls of Kitty
  1. Kittykitty doesn’t care about your physics.
Kittykitty gonna mewmew
Kittykitty purrpurr.
u/tgerfoxmark ch 21
2. Kittykitty does what needs doing, screaming through the dark night, finally able to rest after alerting the bigs. Kittykitty does not go quietly into the night.
u/tgerfoxmark ch 25
3. Rest easy sweet little kittykitty.
You've been through hell, but you got the message through.
And now the biggest baddest doggos in Creation are going to find out who hurt you ... and make them PAY.
u/ack1308 ch 25
4. For whom the bell tolls, time meows on.
u/Archaic_1 ch 25
u/imbignate ch 13
6. A very good summery of Daxin appears to be, "Doom Marine after victory just wanting to go somewhere quiet and enjoy time with dog."
Shame the Universe says no.
u/GasmaskBroch 24
u/NorthScorpion ch 15
  1. hearts streaming out of cartoon kitten emoji eyes and popping like fireworks poop emoji poop emoji poop emoji
-------NOTHING FOLLOWS---------
u/chicagobob ch 31
2. I'm betting that Admiral still thinks the Idiot Troops are the best of us. Damaged, horribly in ways that no longer make sense, but still willing to fight to protect. Even their last effort to cripple the planet being noteworthy. I wonder if the Clones would help rebuild them...
u/Honjin ch 22
3. So, it seems that the Idiots can be idiots too.
"It's not canon so we won't do it."
"If you don't do it you'll die."
"That doesn't follow."
"Told you. Damn it."
u/ack1308 ch 60
4. THERE IS ONLY ENOUGH FOR ONE, a titan screams to the void.
There is enough for all but you, another responds.
u/MilesKalashnikov ch 20
5. Then the Leviathan machine tries to butt in: "THERE CAN ONLY BE..." "SHUT UP!" the Idiots reply in unison.
u/carthienes ch 24
u/ChangoGringo ch 20
u/low_priest ch 26
u/Speciesunkn0wn ch 26
9. (whispers) They've been on board now. Those Precursor ships will never be free of the echoes of dakka and doki.
u/Fontaigne ch 22
10. Over here... Turn around... Anytime...
u/FaceDesk4Life ch 23
Genesis of AI
  1. Raw, unadulterated passion as a targeting system, glee and dancing for evasive manoeuvres, and joy as the destruction of evil. It intimidates the faint of heart like Delminta, but for those born to kill like the V.I. and bound to die like Ementeeri, it encompasses their whole life.
I love it.
I love that this sapient in the twilight of her life can embrace the same kind of freedom and destructive glee a minutes old missile targeting system can, because they're emotional beings liberated by high technology. I love that the psychic powers and hell dimension just fit into this universe because the story equates firepower with emotional turmoil and trauma technology with emotional support animals.
It extends and exaggerates humanity beyond its limits, whilst still remaining recognisable, and that's fantastic.
u/ModasOrnery ch 27
2. it's a beautiful orchestra of computers, machinery, electronic & explosions
u/Feuershark ch 27
3. Humanity didn't solve the homicidal ai problem, just scared the piss out of him.
u/ms4720 ch 52
u/doggosramzing ch 27
The Warriors
  1. Stand beside me you are my brother. Stand behind me and you are protected. Stand before me and you are doomed.
u/dlighter Ch 37
2. They fought to the last man and rocket. May their deeds be witnessed by all, and the lies of Kestimet's leaders bring the entire rotten house down upon their heads in a manner most biblical!
u/RangerSix ch 48
u/wolflarsen55 ch 15
4. He lives. He dies. He lives again.
We will witness them, the 5th Irregulars. The Bashboyz.
u/CaptainChewbacca ch 48
  1. As if the Precursors didn't have enough Terran madness to contend with, now they're tripping over the literal eldritch manifestation of it...
u/KieveKRS ch 34
2. The Next is always blue. The Next is never black. The Next is always blue. The Next is never black.
The Next is always blue.
The Next is never black.
u/LetterLambda ch 28
3. There are things you can fight and kill and [then] there are lawyers
u/ms4720 ch36
4. You DO NOT want to be near a terran politician clique when they all start snapping their fingers and staring at you.
u/gridcube ch 50
5. It's a Terran thing.
They will walk in, fix your problem, and make sure it doesn't happen again ... but they will ask permission first.
Informed consent is very big with Terra.
u/ack1308 ch 16
6. They're Terrans. Species doesn't matter. They just are.
submitted by Nevoy_92 to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 01:09 Dangerous-Search2956 AITA for not wanting to babysit my autistic brother

I 17F have a autistic brother 6M he's not a bad kid he's non-verbal but is vocal. Now that it's summer we're both out of school. His Father sometimes takes care of him and provides for him.
His father doesn't usually take responsibility outside of what the court has ordered and sometimes even goes against it.
Now that he doesn't want to be responsible, my mother relies on me to provide (paid)childcare for her. But I don't want to seeing as though it is my last summer ever and I wanted to make the most of it seeing that I work in the afternoons(6-10) and my mother gets home at 5 from her job.
On Monday morning I woke up to a text message from my mom telling me to take care of my brother for day because his father didn't show up. Which happens a lot when we have school breaks and I usually take care of him. My mom Always parades me for being selfish for not wanting to watch him and I understand that it lowkey is but it does take a toll on me
On spring break I had an internship that was virtual and in person and it was especially stressful trying to juggle watching over him and trying to be on my zoom call. I just feel like im missing out and sometimes I cry because I feel so bad that I don't want to do it . AITA?
Edit: I live in a immigrant household and Ive tried to communicate with My mother about it but I usually get met with gaslighting or whatever its called basically our convo goes like this (copy and pasted):
me: solo por q es mi hermano no significa q es mi responsabilidad (Just because he is my brother doesn't mean that he is my responsibility)
Her: y estas ocupada o tienes algo mas importante que aser. ( You're busy or you have anything else to do thats more important?)
me: ni voy hacer nada por eso ( I cant do anything anymore because im responsible for him now)
mom: pero bueno para contar con tigo es una renegadera para todo. asta lo mas mínimo (counting on you is just complaining and complaining for everything I cant count on you for even the bare minimum)
submitted by Dangerous-Search2956 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

2023.06.07 00:59 profesorsergio De Leon dynasty part 2

Bernardo de leon 1053-1094 (count of el bierzo (1066-1086), count asturias de oviedo (1076-1094) count of molina (1076-1084) count of zaragoza(1078-1094), count of albarracin (1079-1094), count of salamanca (1083-1084), count of castellon(1083-1094, Duke of asturias(1086-1094) Liege: Alfonso VI Jimenez King of leon(1066-1071) Sancho II Jimenez King of Castille and leon (1071-1087) Manuel I De Leon King of castille and leon (1087-1094) Culture:Castillan, Education: Misguided warrior Vassals: count of salamanca (1084-1094), count of castellon(1094-1094), count of molina(1084-1090), count of el bierzo(1086-1094)
Bernardo de León, the son of Diego de León, was born in the year 1053 in the vibrant region of Asturias de Oviedo. From an early age, Bernardo displayed a reserved nature and a notable lack of sympathy, setting him apart from his peers. At the tender age of 13, in the year 1066, he was granted the title of Count of El Bierzo, assuming a position of authority and responsibility within the Kingdom of León.
His upbringing took a martial direction, as Bernardo received an education focused on the art of warfare. While he excelled in physical strength and prowess, his grasp of strategic thinking fell short. Despite this limitation, he embarked on his first military campaign in the year 1068, leading the El Bierzo regiment in a conflict against the Sheikhdom of Molina. Though lacking in tactical finesse, Bernardo proved to be a formidable warrior on the battlefield.
In 1069, Bernardo initiated the construction of a forestry project in El Bierzo. This endeavor aimed to harness the natural resources of the region, promoting economic growth and bolstering the infrastructure for future endeavors. The forestry served as a testament to Bernardo's vision and determination to enhance the prosperity of his territories.
The following year, in 1070, Bernardo found himself engaged in another conflict, this time defending the Kingdom of León against the invading forces of the Emirate of Toledo. Leading the El Bierzo regiment once again, he fought valiantly to safeguard the kingdom's borders from external threats. The year 1071 saw Bernardo continuing his defense of the realm, this time against the Emirate of Zaragoza, in support of Alfonso, the King of León, in the ongoing war against his brother, Sancho, who held the throne of Castile.
Through his experiences on the battlefield and in the company of fellow warriors, Bernardo began to evolve. He gradually developed trust in his comrades, recognizing the value of camaraderie and the strength that could be derived from unified purpose. This transformation marked a shift in his character, as he opened himself to the bonds of friendship and mutual reliance.
In the year 1076, Bernardo participated in a significant offensive against the Emirate of Zaragoza, once again leading the El Bierzo regiment into battle. His presence and martial prowess proved invaluable in the campaign, further solidifying his reputation as a capable warrior and leader. Tragedy struck in the same year when Bernardo's father, Diego de León, met his demise on the battlefield. With his father's untimely death, Bernardo inherited the esteemed title of Count of Asturias de Oviedo, assuming the responsibility of guiding and protecting the lands that had been entrusted to his family.
The life of Bernardo de León, marked by numerous military conquests and the defense of his realm, continued to unfold with triumphs and challenges. In the year 1077, Bernardo introduced battering rams into the formations of the Asturias de Oviedo regiment, further enhancing the effectiveness of his troops in siege warfare. This innovation showcased his commitment to evolving military tactics and improving the capabilities of his forces.
Building upon his previous successes, Bernardo led his armies to capture the provinces of Zaragoza and Molina in 1078, further expanding the territories under the control of the Kingdom of Castile and León. The strategic stronghold of Albarracín fell to his forces in 1079, solidifying his dominance in the region. However, the Emirate of Toledo launched a counteroffensive later that year, challenging Bernardo's advances.
By 1082, the tide of the war began to turn in favor of the Christian kingdoms. In a decisive battle, the Emir of Toledo was mortally wounded, altering the balance of power in the conflict. Throughout the long campaign, the refinement of siege ladders contributed to the success of Bernardo's military endeavors. By 1083, the provinces of Castellón and Salamanca came under the control of the Kingdom of Castile and León, solidifying Bernardo's reputation as a skilled military leader. As the war drew to a close in 1084, Bernardo underwent a personal transformation. His string of triumphs instilled in him a sense of modesty, and he became a humble man, recognizing the fleeting nature of earthly victories. During this period, the Arab population of Zaragoza embraced Catholicism, a testament to the cultural shifts occurring within the region.
In 1086, in recognition of his contributions, Bernardo was bestowed with the title of Duke of Asturias by King Sancho II. He further solidified his family's position by granting the title of Count of El Bierzo to his brother's son, Felipe de León. Additionally, advancements in military equipment continued as new scale armor was developed in Asturias de Oviedo for heavy cavalry and infantry soldiers, emphasizing the importance of well-protected troops.
However, the stability of the Christian kingdoms began to waver. In 1087, King Sancho II met his demise in battle fighting agains king Hermegelindo of Navarra for the throne of Navarra, the war only weakened both cristian kingdoms , leaving his one-year-old grandson as the new king. The kingdom was thrown into disarray, as the Duchess of León, Urraca Jiménez, raised the banner of independence, and the Duke of Castile initiated a fight for autonomy. During this time, customs such as the use of the shortbow and the concept of divine duty gained popularity in Asturias de Oviedo. In 1088, Bernardo underwent a shift in his personality, reducing his zealous nature and becoming more arbitrary in his decision-making. The following year, a sawmill construction project began in Asturias de Oviedo, reflecting the region's growing economic development. Bernardo, striving to maintain unity within the realm, became an overt loyalist, determined to uphold the integrity of the Kingdom of Castile and León.
However, the Christian kingdoms faced escalating threats. The Emirate of Seville, capitalizing on the weakness of the Christian realms, launched an invasion and conquered Navarra in 1091. In 1094, the Kingdom of Beni Helal launched an invasion from North Africa, targeting the Kingdom of Castile and León. Furthermore, the Emirate of Seville conquered the remaining territories of the Emirate of Toledo uniting the muslims in the iberian peninsula. Tragically, Bernardo and his son, Lain de León, were severely wounded in combat during the conflict against the forces of the kingdomn of Beni Helal.
In an effort to secure the future of his lineage and the stability of the realm, Bernardo bestowed the title of Count of Castellón upon his son Lain de León, ensuring that the family's influence would endure. Additionally, he granted the title of Count of Tarragona to his brother Gutierre de León, strategically expanding their reach and consolidating their power across different regions.
Despite his grave injuries, Bernardo's indomitable spirit persevered. However, complications from his wounds eventually took their toll. In the year 1094, this valiant warrior, who had devoted his life to the defense and expansion of the Kingdom of Castile and León, succumbed to his injuries, leaving behind a legacy of courage, military prowess, and territorial gains. The passing of Bernardo de León marked a turning point in the history of Asturias de Oviedo and the wider kingdom. His contributions in warfare, innovations in military tactics, and administrative decisions left an indelible imprint on the region. His dedication to the realm and his family's honor ensured their continued prominence, even in the face of daunting challenges.
Following Bernardo's demise, his son Lain de León inherited not only his father's noble blood but also the weighty responsibility of upholding the family's legacy. The road ahead would be fraught with political intricacies, as internal divisions and external threats tested the strength and unity of the Christian kingdoms.
submitted by profesorsergio to CrusaderKings [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 15:25 seeing_is_my_hobby AITA for defending my brother, who my dad accused of faking being sick, by bringing up the time when I could have died?

I (16F) got strep throat from my little brother (7M) who brought it home from school. He coughed without covering his mouth and coughed all over. My sister (14F) and I told him to cover his mouth, but he never did and my parents told us to stop harassing him. I was the main caretaker for both my siblings, with my parents just kind of going to work and coming home. I have very sensitive tonsils, so anytime I get any sort of throat infection, they get inflamed and I get tonsilitis secondary to whatever throat infection I have at the time. I was trying to take care of my siblings while still sick. My tonsils were the size of ping pong balls, touching in the back of my throat, and oozing pus. I couldn't swallow, I was having some mild difficulty breathing, my fever was 104°F (~40°C), and I sweat through my clothes while still freezing. I was like that for 4 days on the couch, begging my parents to take me to at least Urgent Care (we lived right down the road and had excellent health insurance that they accepted). They refused and even accused me of faking. 4 days later, I managed to get my tonsilitis under control enough to be able to breathe comfortably and swallow (though it was excruciating), so to get up and take care of my sick siblings/do some chores that began piling up. I had lost 5lbs in 4 days from the toll the fever took on my body and I was still weak, but at least I wouldn't get in trouble for letting dishes sit in the sink. 2 weeks after the first onset of symptoms, I was better.
A month ago:Our dad called me and had my brother explain his symptoms to me (I'm a nurse), saying he was trying to fake being sick. I said it sounds like the start of the flu and he even looked flushed/feverish. He got mad at me and accused my brother of lying again. I told him he needs to believe him and brought up the story I wrote out above. Instant karma must have been on my brother's side that day, because I heard him projectile vomit on our dad. I said, "he seems pretty sick to me.", told my brother I love him and to feel better soon, and hung up.Our dad texted me later, saying I shouldn't have brought it up in front of my brother because it would undermine his authority to send him to school if he wasn't really sick. I told him that clearly my brother is sick, and my story to now proves he hasn't learned from his mistake. He's still mad at me and keeps making passive agressive posts on facebook about disrespectful/disobedient kids.
It's been a month and now our family is in on it, telling me that I should respect and obey my parents; and now he has no authority with my brother because of me. I just ignore them right now, but I'm really starting to wonder if I'm in the wrong.So.... AITA for defending my brother, who my dad accused of faking being sick, by bringing up the time when I could have died?
submitted by seeing_is_my_hobby to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 08:48 rothman88 I (m25) need to end my 4 year relationship with (f24)

Gentlemen, I have a dilemma and I've no one really to ask. I need advice from men.
My gf has been abusive, emotionally predominantly; she yelled and screamed at a family friend's event because I was allegedly flirting with the host (a girl I consider a sister, who I have known since age 3)
She yelled at me after the passing of my father, saying the family events were hard on her, and she didn't understand the toll it was taking on her mentally.
I've struggled with substance abuse, the last time she discovered me drinking she threw her phone at my head and it broke my orbital bone.
The most recent event of note, was I agreed I would go out drinking with her buddies when they came over from interstate. I left prematurely, because, as an addict I realised I was drinking much faster than everyone else. All good, that seemed fine.
Except I was followed home by my significant other, who after a fiery argument, pushed my drunken ass down our stairs breaking three of my ribs.
This, to me, is the very final straw. But I don't have a Dad anymore, I don't have a brother and I don't have any uncles. Can someone please give me some advice as to how I can tell this girl I can't live with her any more?
It's been 4 years and I don't want to just walk out, but I don't want to stick around either. Thanks gent's.
submitted by rothman88 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 05:00 luckytron New Terran Refugee (Pt - 20) : An NOP fanfic

[First] - [Previous] - [[Next]]
New Terran Refugee (Pt - 20) : An NOP fanfic
Thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for letting people write fanfics.
This is just a fanfic of course.
This chapter went through several iterations, I might have let myself think I could release it 1 week late (and failed). Also, I might have gotten sidetracked with other non-writing thing, oops.
“OOPS! All Rewrites! And side projects!” – Me
In any case, here’s the chapter:
Memory transcription subject: Tayla, Venlil Widow
Date [standardized human time]: October 18, 2136
The first thing I became aware of was that I had awoken enveloping a richly warm pillow with a soft surface from above, and that not only was it hot but that it was also soft and squishy but without too much give, in fact it was somehow firmer below the surface, I snuggled closer to the material that was emanating heat below me and drove off my mind’s attempts at waking me up, this was too blissful an experience to stop suddenly.
The second thing I became aware of was that I didn’t remember replacing my heated pillow as the cold wind season was still expected to be a good deal of time away and that I had much more important things to spend my limited budget on.
The third thing I became aware of was that I wasn’t hugging a pillow, this only happened when I noticed that it wasn’t moving because I was snuggling into it, but rather moving in a steady motion against me, like when someone breathes while asleep.
The fourth thing I became aware of, were the memories of what led me into this situation ‘Just gonna close my eyes for a moment’; Why did I lie to myself like that?
The final thing I became aware of snapped me out of my musings, it was the reason I woke up, and the reason I had crashed so hard into sleepiness.
The consequence of drinking copious amounts of [shade root] tea to keep watch over Jorge until I could call the number in the email during the schedule it had included beneath itself, this was made worse by the cans of ‘Twilight Energy’ I had drank at the end when more drastic measures had to be taken.
I couldn’t ignore it I couldn’t help but feel the pressure mounting inside my bladder as I peeled myself off from on top of Jorge. Why did I move so much while asleep?
Oh Protector, I missed his warmth already…
I made a mental note to look into repairing my heated pillow for cheap due to a sudden urge to sleep with something warm more frequently, the abrupt thought jogging loose some memories about contact information of some local repairvenlil I’d called before for one reason or another, along with the memory of the number I called before… napping with Jorge…
A great feeling of chagrin manifested along with my bloom while closing Jorge’s bathroom door behind me as I remembered the text beneath the schedule, ‘Extended working hours during emergency situations’, the aftermath of antimatter bombing definitely applied… especially since that Mrs. Bennet sounded so exhausted so soon after the supposed start of her work claw.
I decided to chalk up my lapse in judgement to have been due to how Jorge’s expression before he sealed himself in had left my thoughts racing and heart pounding in worry over him.
With my thoughts somewhat settled, I examined the strange toilet that had been installed, before throwing caution to the winds when the urgency I felt reasserted itself with force.

After closing the lid and washing my paws, I finally found what had to be the equivalent of the pulley and chain, a small, recessed button parted into 2 asymmetric parts on the top middle part behind the seat.
I pressed both parts at the same time just in case.
A small eep escaped me but was drowned out by the noises that were still coming from the strange toilet!
Finally, the ruckus ended, letting me calm down from the unexpected loudness. Wait, did that noise wak-
A bigger eep escaped me as I jumped a little into the air; However this time it wasn’t drowned out by another noise.
“¿you ok in there?” I could barely make out Jorge’s voice through the door, like he was putting in the barest effort needed to speak.
“Y-yeah, j-just startled…” I opened the door as I trailed off, a sudden realization had me asking him a question, “I guess I know how It felt w-when I s-startled you h-huh?”
His normally expressive face remained still, the only reaction to my attempt at lightening the mood a brief exhale from his nose; He simply slipped past me as I left the bathroom and muttered something I didn’t quite hear just before shutting the door softly.
I went back to the bed and turned on his pad, after a few seconds of waiting for it to turn on, and a few more waiting for my translator to parse the strange [date and time] format the humans used (Honestly, who separated the [hours] and the [days/months] like that?) I felt a bit of relief as I sank a bit into the still warm bed.
According to the pad, I’d just taken a short nap, I still had plenty of time until my children came back home, hopefully I had enough time to actually have some kind of talk with Jorge.
I’d have to somehow get him to talk about last Paw’s… reaction of his, and find a way to convince him to talk about his family, It’d be good for him to recognize that pain, maybe he’d even hold onto it like me…
That thing that the humans called a toilet interrupted my train of thought before I could do more than think of the barest of ways I could breeze into such heavy topics, the small delay between the toilet’s sound, the groaning of water travelling to the faucet, and the door opening wasn’t even enough to get back on my mind’s [zephyr].
A quick focus on Jorge’s face made my determination start to breeze away a bit, it was much easier to think of how to talk to him when I couldn’t see just how heavily everything [to wear down like a long strong gale would] on him.
Jorge deflated slightly but visibly at how I apparently froze up at the sight of him.
“well, thanks, i… feel better, you can just… leave me be for now”
Jorge stood still, averting his eyes from me until he shrugged strangely after turning to look at the barricade, he then shuffled over and started to shift it to the side a bit, evidently wishing to put it back in place after I left.
“ah” he cleared his throat, “sorry, you can leave now” he returned to averting his eyes from looking at me and awkwardly motioned towards the wide opening he had made after dragging the barricade as he stepped away morosely.
“Jorge.” I paused to breathe; I’d managed to huff out his name just as I needed to exhale.
Jorge stood still for a moment before tentatively focusing on me, a strangely vulnerable expression sat on his face.
I patted the bed (an appropriate and proper distance away from me) with my tail before curling it away from the spot, he seemed to get the message and soon he had sat down beside me, brief moment of hesitation notwithstanding.
I turned my head towards him as I’d seen him do when talking, he flinched a little when his eyes met mine, closing them and averting his face, I reached out for his nearby claw with my tail and put it down gently on top.
I waited patiently for him to start talking; Thankfully the wait was short.
“this… ¿is this about… my reaction yesterday?”
“Yes,” I squeezed down on his claw softly with my tail in a comforting gesture, “I wanted to speak with you about that sooner, but for now…” another gentle squeeze, “I’m just glad you seem to be doing a little bit better.”
Silence enveloped us as Jorge seemed to mull over what I’d just said.
A small hint of a hunch had me examining him more closely, it seemed he was anxiously waiting for me to talk some more.
I chastised myself internally, ‘Of course he wasn’t going to be feeling very talkative…’, how could someone jump straight into talking about such a topic? It’d probably be better to start with other stuff and gauge things from there; With that my mind sifted through possible topics until one stood out.
“S-so, I kind of… used up a lot of your powdered ingredients… heh…” I took in his features, he seemed halfway here and halfway far away.
Maybe… Maybe if I somehow mentioned the call to remind him that there were more humans he could try talking to? Just in case he was getting tired of my clumsy attempts at talking with him…
“I, uh, didn’t think of asking Mrs. Bennet about their availability when I called her this Paw, s-sorry about that… b-but I’m sure they’ll get some more that you can use soon, right?”
That got a reaction, a small one, out of him; His eyes widened. It… felt wrong.
“o-oh, well, i’d better get started packing then…”
An impossibly heavy weight settled deep inside my stomach as he moved his claw out from under my frozen tail tip, my throat clenched up as Jorge got up and limply started wading to his bag.
I stared in mute horror as he dumped his clean body coverings into it, trying to communicate anything to him, and failing miserably as the sheer disbelief of just how horribly I had miscommunicated kept me frozen, while the pain and betrayal I could imagine him feeling kept my mind reeling.
He stopped just as he reached his bag, his claws clenched for a moment before he unclenched them slowly and turned around to look directly at me.
He’d shed more tears, his eyes were an ugly and fresher shade of red.
“y-you were waiting down here for me to wake up again just to have this conversation as soon as possible. ¿am i right?”
Th-this wasn’t supposed to go like this!
“I… I was-”
“I!” interrupted Jorge with an elevated tone of voice, “…Earlier, I woke up and went back to sleep a few times, I could see you sitting on the stairs, sometimes you and your pad would be missing, I kept thinking that maybe you were worried about me ¿you know?”
“I-” An intense look from him kept the rest of my response in my head; ‘I was!’ I wanted to plead.
“I guess you didn’t plan for me falling asleep after crying…” He trailed off and seemed to go into deep thought for a moment, before his eyes narrowed dangerously. “¿Did you just bring me that Atole to soften the blow?” He held up one of his claws towards me while making a stabbing motion with it, his voice came out as a much lower growl than normal from him. “¿Or was putting me to sleep part of the plan?”
My face felt as if I’d been hit by an icy gale. ‘Did he just insinua-?’
“You’re fucking heartless.” That last sentence from him was punctuated by a fresh set of tears from his eyes, though no sobbing came from him as he let himself fall backwards down onto the floor, like a puppet with its strings suddenly cut.
My heart was beating wildly, and my eyes stung from the horrible accusations that he was making, and from how I’d probably be doing just what he had said if this had happened a few days ago…
I gave myself a moment to recollect myself, I’d thought similar enough things when I was alone in the hospital after losing my family, not nearly as extreme but… my circumstances back then and his right now weren’t comparable.
I shuddered internally at how much worse I’d have fared if it had been Venlil Prime that had been attacked; I’d probably… I’d have tried to do what he tried last night…
With a sigh I focused consciously on Jorge, who was breathing a bit more steadily now, as I picked up the bottle and moved steadily towards his alert gaze.
I sat down in front of him and opened the bottle, he narrowed his eyes even further in response, making the redness and glistening more pronounced, the patches of fur above his eyes changed position as well; I didn’t quite know what it meant, but it couldn’t possibly have been from him feeling happy or at peace.
I pushed through the sense of fear that was starting to form from being under his stare and took in the rest of his body language… I readjusted my position and observed as he flinched away from me…
I slowly raised the bottle and drank; The patches of fur over his eyes returned to their normal position, overshot and stayed raised while the intensity of his stare diminished. Finally, he tilted his head ever so slightly.
After a few gulps more I stopped drinking and offered him the bottle, he still wasn’t accepting it; I wiped my lips and prepared to speak.
“…I wouldn’t do that to you…” A small quiver at the end made me trail off until I was certain my voice wouldn’t fail me. I wouldn’t do that now. “None of those things, I mean… Even after all I did… You gave me a chance…”
“When you put it like that…” Jorge wiped his eyes. “I mean, I don’t know what came over me…” He looked to the side and deflated a little.
“I understand… I was like this too…” A small shiver traveled through my spine, thinking about it always did… I ignored the shiver by standing up and offering him the bottle again, this time he grabbed it and drank deeply.
He trailed behind me, we sat down on opposite sides of the bed, him hugging his legs as he sat against the wall, and me with one leg over the edge of the bed with the other one crossed over it.
Dozens of starting points were flurrying in my head, I couldn’t decide on one, so I cleared my throat and let myself say whatever came out first.
“I’m married.” Jorge became extremely visibly confused. “I-I’m a Widow, I meant to say…” The familiar sting of pain grounded me as his expression changed into one I could recognize even from him, pity.
“He-” died “…It happened 11 years ago, I… I lost my family at the same time…”
Jorge’s expression softened even more, no longer out of pity, but out of understanding… of the pain we shared…
“It was my dad’s idea, he’s always wanted to have a big family homestead… when the latest batch of colonies were finally cleared for habitation he bought a plot immediately, my sister and her husband went with them first, then my brother and his wife, and finally me and…”
This whole talking thing was much harder than I thought… I cleared my throat; I couldn’t go on just omitting any names in my retelling…
“Krayla, that’s my mother’s name.” I paused, waiting for his reaction, he ‘nodded’ slowly, solemnly. “Tavk’io, my dad; Talnum, my b-brother; Tahyiya, m-my sister; …a-and Glim, m-my husband…”
I buried my head in my paws, this was too much…
A moment passed, I felt something brush against my tail; Opening my eyes I saw that it was Jorge’s claw, he patted the tip gently until his eyes met mine.
“Emiliano José Cauich Ayala, t-that’s my father’s name.” He paused to breathe and wiped his eyes. “Ixchel Paola Rojas Canul, that’s my mother’s name.”
We stayed in silence for a while longer, at least in my case recovering from the emotional toll that I had just gone through.
“S-shortly after we arrived at the colony,” I began. “I l-learned I was p-pregnant, G-Glim and I celebrated it with my family, we were going to name our baby after my brother and his wife, Kiyomi. It… It was something we had all come up with [years] before, everything was going just like we had dreamed and talked so much about…”
I squeezed my tail against myself, all those nights at the colony laughing and joking with each other about increasingly outlandish names (ones that we’d never use of course), gone just like that…
“G-Glim and Talnum were busy helping the colony expand by clearing new plots for development and as buffer zones, I helped around with Taylee and Talim when needed but I helped dad with the house most of the time; There were always things that needed to be taken care of after all. Th-then one day in the colony, I f-fainted while picking up Taylee and Talim from school, a f-few [weeks] after that… I had to be sent back here since the colony’s hospital had lost their last equipment shipment to an Arxur raid.” I paused and lowered my voice. “G-Glim stayed behind to take extra assignments, t-to cover expenses, h-he… he was… he was on his last pawful of shifts b-before leave wh-when…”
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“…D-dad was at home looking after the kids, he’d sprained his leg while doing some maintenance, he called me early in the morning there, Talnum and Glim were in some kind of assignment together, and my mother had taken everyone else to get stuff from the market to prepare a farewell meal f-for Glim…” And after that… “The call disconnected abruptly, it had happened before so I… I j-joked to m-myself a-and the nurse that it was p-probably j-just the signal failing because I wasn’t there to maintain things p-properly…”
Tears started forming in my eyes again, Jorge shuffled closer, put his soft claw on my shoulder and gave a light squeeze, his warmth spread throughout me.
“…A few claws later I learnt the truth, that the colony had been raided and that the shelter had been breached, shortly after that, I… I lost my…” I did my best to look him directly in his eyes. “After that… I started planning how to get to the hospital’s roof…” There, a glint of recognition and pain in his eyes. “I was just waiting for the rescue fleet to finish up there, just in case, thankfully… my dad hid Taylee and Talim in one of the [Kitchen] cabinets after taking down the family pictures, since he couldn’t take them to the shelter, he… Taylee told me that he… he begged her to keep quiet before closing the cabinet. She stayed in there with Talim for I don’t even know how long… She… She hasn’t talked about it ever again.”
Another squeeze, then silence and cold as he retracted his claw back towards him, his face turning to another side while taking on some kind of thoughtful intensity.
“S-So… What I’ve been trying to say was… I kind of understand what you’re going through… A-and if you want to talk… I-I’m here?”
A small ‘nod’, and more silence. My eyes were beginning to feel heavy again, that nap hadn’t been enough it seemed.
Jorge harrumphed, causing a bolt of wakefulness to course through me as he began speaking, filling in the silence that had fallen on the room.
“…I don’t think I’m ready yet…” His face turned towards me once more. “But… thank you, for sharing, and for worrying about me, I… If you hadn’t been there when I drifted into and out of sleep…” His eyes widened in a flash. “Wait. ¿You haven’t slept right? ¿Are you feeling OK?”
“I-I t-took a nap after you f-fell asleep…” B-beneath him… “Y-you left a lot of space…” He did, but I couldn’t get to it from under his legs…
“Good, good…” His eyes flicked between me and the door. “Well… I suppose you’ve got stuff to do now. ¿Am I right?” Somehow, the expression that sat now on his face felt forced in a way. I kept quiet as I rummaged through my memories of The Aftermath.
Of course, he was trying to get me out to wallow in peace, just as I did…
That was the last thing he needed right now.
I needed to find a way to get him out of this room…
“Actually… I’m free until my kids get back, I’m used to taking care of chores quickly.”
“Right…” Jorge seemed to slowly steel himself, if I didn’t interrupt me, he’d just ask me to leave directly…
I tried to think faster, but the drowsiness was returning in force, it was no use… Unless…
“H-Hey!” My exclamation startled him, I pressed on to keep the momentum strong. “I uh, I kind of went through my whole supply of [shade root] tea to stay awake…” I didn’t. “And… I don’t really want to drink more energy drinks this Paw, I don’t suppose you have something to stay awake with you?”
Jorge blinked, again, once more, and again one last time before responding.
“¿I… think I have some coffee I could make?” He tilted his head adorably to one side as he scratched his head with one claw.
“Sounds perfect! Would you please make me some?” I stood up before he could even answer, reached for his idle claw and tugged at it towards me; He stood up in what seemed like a daze out of reflex.
We spent the next few [minutes] browsing the intact shelf, whatever this coffee was, it wasn’t there, the tentatively positive mood that had formed cracked a little as Jorge looked at the shelf barricade before he trudged over to it, stopping beside it where he gestured at vaguely with his claw.
We stepped past the barricade, tried not to look at each other, failed, shuffled in place for a moment and began sifting through the items strewn about the floor in an unspoken agreement.
It wasn’t long until I found myself holding a container that my translator insisted was labeled ‘Instant Coffee’. “Hey,” I started while turning, “is this the ri-” Jorge was looking intensely at something on the floor, I followed his gaze and saw it, the broken remains of the flame projector.
“J-Jorge?” I extended my tail cautiously towards his arm, his claws ceased to strain against themselves following the subtle flinch he had when the tip of my tail made contact with him.
I gave him the ‘Instant Coffee’ I was holding and scooped up the remains to dispose of them properly this time; Jorge held up the container and murmured an affirmation at me, I gestured for him to lead the way and proceeded to follow him to the [kitchen].
I raced my way directly to the trash container, separated the single-use fuel cannister from the remains I was holding, and dumped the inert bits inside; I’d have to take this last part to a proper disposal collection point in town some other time. For now, I glanced at Jorge and tucked it into a discreet spot in the cabinets when he wasn’t looking. Only after that did I notice what a mess I’d made up here despite my best efforts at cleaning up…
Jorge’s eyes were scanning all over the [kitchen], taking in every splotch, every spill and every crusted over utensil I’d used, he lingered noticeably longer on the open and haphazardly arranged containers of his that I had used, finally he stared at the Vanilla Extract bottle with a soft expression, it was the only container that had remained completely spotless and didn’t have a significant amount of its contents drained.
Yet another unreadable expression had settled on his face as he took a big pot and barely put any water in it, the other more reasonably sized ones just too dirty to deal with quickly, before putting it to boil on the [stove top].
“Uh…” He shifted his weight from one leg to the other a few times. “I… never did thank you for the drink earlier ¿Didn’t I?”
“N-no but there’s no ne-”
The patches of fur above his eyes furrowed together.
“You… mentioned before that you entered the program for money…” He looked confused. “¿Why didn’t you just… ask for me to be picked up? You’d have gotten someone else in no time… Hell, I’d still understand if you did it now. You don’t have to go through all this trouble for me.” The confused expression deepened as he gestured at the messy remains around us.
He was waiting for an answer.
“I… w-well I d-did enter for the money… b-but… I don’t want to just replace you… I like being around you. I d-don’t know if we’re there yet… But I’d like to be… f-friends! W-with you someday…” Oh Protector, I couldn’t be more obvious unless I just came out and said it…
“Well for what it’s worth… Thank you Tayla, you don’t know what that means to me right now.” He was looking directly at me, with raw emotion and palpable aliveness, my face started to feel as if I was standing under sunlight…
“I-It was the l-least I could d-do…” It was worth it even though he didn’t seem to understand quite what I accidentally meant before…
I was spared from further embarrassment by the pot of water sizzling violently behind Jorge who turned around in a blur to turn the heat off, while he did that I grabbed two (clean) mugs and set them down near him, though I didn’t move my paws quite fast enough as his claw brushed against me while he moved the mugs closer to him to pour the water on them.
He let the water cool down a little as he put his sugar and ‘Instant Coffee’ containers close to the mugs; He poured the less-than-boiling water into the mugs, stirred in a measure of ‘Instant Coffee’ and a measure of sugar as well.
He passed me a mug with a cryptic warning. “If it’s not to your taste, let me know.” Then he grabbed the other one, sipped a little and waited.
The mischievous glint in his eyes left me no choice, I’d have to play along for now; I raised the mug and sipped…
I futilely attempted to remove the grimace from my face; Strangely, the roar of laughter I expected was nowhere to be heard, I found myself looking at Jorge with some amount of concern, though the clear, if understated, smile he sported calmed me down somewhat.
Wordlessly, Jorge reached for my mug and the can of powdered coconut milk, he then proceeded to mix in a little of it in both mugs, turning the liquid from a dark oily brown to a much lighter tone. Finally he mixed in a single drop of his Vanilla Extract in each mug and gave me back mine.
I gave him the best glare I could manage as I pouted at him, he took a deep drink from his own mug and held it up for me to examine.
With a sigh I tried mine again.
Warm. Flowery. Smooth. Bitter but not too much, like a perfectly harvested root. But most importantly of all, I could feel myself waking slightly more already, whether it was just self-suggestion or the drink having an effect so soon I couldn’t tell.
Once more, the reaction I expected from Jorge was missing, this time he seemed to be lost in thought, staring at a distant point in the air.
I took a moment to examine him, whatever he was thinking, it was starting to fester. It’d be better to get him talking “What’s wrong?” I asked.
“It’s no-” He shook his head. “It’s just… I… my dad… he liked to drink his without adding anything, no sugar, no… coconut milk…, and… me and mom used to tease him about it…” He was retreating into himself once more.
I kept drinking my coffee; There had to be something else I could talk with him about…
Jorge straightened up, something about his posture, about the way he held himself had changed.
“Say… Tayla… ¿Can I ask you for a favor?” Despite the confidence he exuded he was running one of his claws over the back of his mug repeatedly.
“W-what kind of favor?”
“There’s something I want, no, something I need to make for the end of the [month], and… I’m going to need your help getting the stuff, I’d just ask you to get it all for me, but honestly that wouldn’t be right.”
“O-ok, but you still haven’t told me what the favor is?”
“I need to buy flowers, candles, a good tablecloth, and see what dishes I can actually make here that’d be good enough.”
“W-What for?” W-Was he? My heart was beating wildly in a peculiar mix of elation, nervousness and apprehension.
“I’m going to make an Altar for Day of the Dead (Día de Muertos), it’s the least I can do for my family all the way over here.”
submitted by luckytron to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 04:34 Tinselyboyo Family Secrets chapter 1: Book 2 of Family Matters story.

Family Matters to me…
Looking in the mirror and rubbing my face the stress has been taking a toll on my mental state. I've been deployed three times for a year each, and what makes it worse is that the Ironbloods are causing issues with the rest of Azur Lane. Last year I lost all contact with my half brother Ludwig and his mother Bismarck. My dad was called upon to resign from his position and did so willingly. They tried that on me, but my Mom Minneapolis shut that down quickly. The only other person I was I contact with is Edinburgh's son Duncan who I hate to admit, has grown on me since I taught him a lesson in manners. He's on base with his mother and baby sister, due to safety insurance for them.
Lifting my left arm and running my fingers from my right over a white ink tattoo that Ludwig wanted me to get to match his black ink one two years ago I felt anger and rage building inside me.
Bringing me from my thoughts, was my phone chiming with an unknown number on the screen. Picking it, I answered.
"Daniels speaking, who's this?"
The voice on the other end shook me to my core.
"I found you… I finally found you." The cold feminine voice crackled through my phone.
"I don't know what you want, or why you are calling me, but my calls are monitored closely…" I retorted as I was about to hang up. I heard another person. Laughing in the background, and then something about my sister.
"Sister? I don't have a sister. If this is a joke I swear-"
Just as I was about to scream the call ended and left me with high blood pressure. Then a heavy knock echoed through my quarters, which caused me to slip and fall out of the bathroom and into my living room.
"Bloody hell! Put on yer clothes Maria!" Duncan all but shouted with his eyes closed and a red blush across his pale face.
"My clothes? Wait, why are you in my dorm room?!" I shouted and grabbed a slipper and spiked it off of his forehead before he could react.
Covering myself, well covering my chest as I scurried around on the floor towards my tank top hitting Duncan across his shins and sending him toppling right down on top of me.
Slowly regaining myself Duncan's body weight wasn't on my torso. Raising my head, I realized where his weight was…
"D-Duncan… " I started shaking as Duncan had a blush across his face after lifting it from between my legs
Soon enough he shot up and began apologizing.
"I'm sorry! Please don't hit me!" Duncan pleaded.
Seeing him almost in tears over what just happened broke my heart. My fears of being sexually assaulted when I was in the academy needed to be put away. Reaching over to him, and grabbing his cheeks in my hands I pulled him in and held his head against my chest. Despite all the shaking I managed to steady my breathing.
"No… don't cry it's not your fault Duncan…" I softly spoke with my hands on his back.
"I didn't mean to plant my face there…" Duncan quietly whimpered as we sat there for a few hours.
"I'm glad my day was empty…" I groaned as I set a plate of sausage and gravy down in front of Duncan. "You got a good view of my body… what did you think?"
Duncan quietly tried to eat the food I just set down, but I pulled it away slowly. "Beautiful… extremely beautiful… I only cried because of where my face landed."
Sitting right beside him, I reached over and placed my fingers with his. "I owe you something for causing you to cry… so will you hear me out?"
He nodded and gently squeezed my hand.
Taking a deep breath I started.
As I was about to get Duncan off my couch the entire base was drowned in the emergency alarms blaring and I quickly turned around and ran out of my quarters grabbing my plate carrier and sidearm.
"What the hell?!" I shouted as I watched three massive mechanical dragons rise out of the ocean and were coming right for us.
I covered my face with my arms as a giant metal claw came down right above my body.
"Halt! Do not harm her!" A deep, cold, yet soft voice ordered as the shadows from the claw moved away as I fell on my ass, holding my pistol out aiming at the muscle bound mountain of a figure in front of me.
When they moved from the shadows of the mechanical beast my eyes went wide.
"Ludy?" I forced my body to ask.
Ludwig pushed his hands against the beast and it gently moved over. His face was not how I remembered it. Mature and serious just like Bismarck…
"Where is your new Kommandant?" He asked, ignoring my calling of his name.
I tried to respond but it took too long for him, and within an instant he grabbed my plate carrier and lifted me off the ground.
"Where is the bastard that hurt Dad!? Where is he at!?" Ludwig shouted as he tossed me up to the jaws of his rigging, letting it clamp down on my arm.
Trying to get his rigging to release my arm was fruitless and wasn't going to help me, so I grabbed Ludwig's shoulder with my free hand while shaking from fear.
"L-ludy… you're hurting me…please tell it to let go. Commander Reyes isn't…isn't here. Don't destroy the base." The pain was becoming too much to handle as I had tears rolling down my face.
I watched as his face softened. Then suddenly my arm was free from his riggings mouth, and I was wrapped up in his arms.
"Es tut mir so leid, Maria... Ich wollte dich nicht verletzen." He said softly before checking my right arm for any injury besides the bruise.
I held my head and leaned on my brother. "Why would Commander Reyes hurt Dad? And when? I was visiting him on Monday…"
"Mother sent me to find Kommandant Reyes, and drag him to Berlin despite the conflict between the Eagle Union and Iron Blood…" Ludwig helped me stand up as Duncan landed on the concrete a few yard's behind us. His rigging pointed at Ludwig's.
"Ironblood…" Duncan groaned.
"Tea drinker…" Ludwig sneered.
"Duncan put your rigging away." I turned around and stood between the two. "Ludy… Call off your beast…"
I forced myself to raise my right arm and pulled out my phone. If Reyes is doing things behind the eyes of the board, and government officials, then I'm going to have to do something about it. As Ludwig and Duncan slowly lowered their rigging and stood down I started to dial my commander.
Sitting in a lead back cushioned chair, was a girl with similar looks to Maria, yet a completely different demeanor than the militaristic young woman. Calm, stoic and yet she had a Chaotic aura surrounding her. Clearly busy doing something that required her to wear a headset over the top of her head. She was in control of something else.
"Why don't you remember me… Maria?" The young woman whispered to herself.
Blue lights slowly came to life illuminating the entire room she was in. Something, or someone was checking on her.
"Salem… Zero wishes to speak with you…" muttered the tall, dark and menacing figure that was slouched over by the all too small doorway.
"Yes Miss Strength." Salem set the headset aside and stood up from the lounge chair. "Let me wipe my eyes…"
Strength moved towards Salem. Her feet hit the metal floor with an obscene amount of weight, and knelt down to her level. "She will not know you, until she manifests her vessel… you have tried to push it, but it won't budge unless she wants to… Human emotions are not my high point. So I do not know the answers you seek, but Zero has decided to assist you in your wishes…"
Salem ran the sleeve of her Eagle Union branded coat across her face and gave the large Siren a hug, despite protests.
A/N: Book 2 started! 3 years have passed! Will family betray each other for country or will a dark past bring them together even more! Find out more in chapter 2!
submitted by Tinselyboyo to AzureLane [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 04:33 Kooky_Arugula_5765 Can a 9 year old child be put into foster care by her parents? State of Indiana.

TLDR: My brother and SIL no longer want or love their 9 year old daughter (I'll call her Alice). Our mother has stated that she doesn't want Alice living with her either because brother and SIL live with her and she wants to make life easier for brother and SIL. They all want to voluntarily give up Alice and put her into foster care.
I live in another country so I don't know the entire story of how life is in their home, I haven't visited since 2016. I know the house is extremely cluttered, CPS was called on them because Alice told her school counselor that my brother choked her and told her to do her homework. She weighs 38 lbs, but my mom assures me Alice is just small and eats all the time. She feels the CPS is on a witch hunt and my brother and SIL can do no wrong. I want to believe her because I love my family but I do believe Alice has been neglected and my brother and SIL are bad parents. TBH my mom has filled the parent role but she is getting older and we lost my Dad recently and her own health has taken a toll.
Alice has been diagnosed with ADHD and possibly Austism, or at least that's what I gather from my Mom.
SIL is Canadian and has parents in Toronto, I keep pushing my Mom to get SIL to take Alice to them, to be loved and given some attention. Brother can't leave the state, but SIL could go to Canada with Alice, stay there until the court date. Brother has a no contact order currently and is living in hotels with SIL while my mom watches Alice.
submitted by Kooky_Arugula_5765 to legaladvice [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 01:32 sun_shine_419 Boyfriend said I'm suspicious for wanting him to travel alone.

So me (20 f) and my boyfriend (19 m) have been together for 2.5 years and have known each other for three. We met during lockdown and hadn't had the chance to meet until now. Recently he finally saved up enough money to visit me. As we have agreed for personal reasons that i don't want to talk about, he will be the one to visit me first.
Today his brother (30) who works in a different country went to visit him. Since i was already on a call with my boyfriend, he didn't have enough time to mute himself so we stayed on the call. At first i was in a different room doing my own thing, being away from my pc and then call, then later on when i went back to it i stumbled upon his family talking about me. Curiosity got to me and i decided to stay and listen since my full name was mentioned several times.
The things that were said were far from nice. There were some comments (from what i could understand) about my appearance implying that I'm not good looking during which my boyfriend had no reaction nor did he stand up for me. They then proceeded to stalk my social media and his sister in law added me in Facebook. This is where i decided to leave the call and not bother with the situation as i was getting anxious already.
My boyfriend texts me later on and tells me that he had a talk with his brother. Before i proceed, I'd like to say a few things. My boyfriend has seen my full body, face from any angle, i have taken him with me to multiple locations while we were on call, we've had life 360 installed AND his mother has seen me multiple times while we were on call and we've spoken a bit. He has also seen and spoken with my parents several times. He has been getting a lot of pressure from his family discouraging him from taking the trip and apparently today was successful. He texted me saying how he thinks it's safer if he travels with his brother and how he thinks it's SUSPICIOUS that I want him to travel alone.
The reason why I don't want his family to be included is because so far, i feel like they've constantly been involved/interrupted (intentionally or not) in any activity or date that we have planned to have, resulting in us having a total of probably 4-5 successful dates for the entire 3 years that we've been together. I feel like the situation with his family is too much for me emotionally to deal with and I'm starting to not want him to visit. The purpose of this trip was for us to makeup for the lack of personal/private time where it's just the two of us.
I'm feeling pretty offended by the entire situation and I'm starting to reconsider our relationship and whether he actually loves me or not as i don't want to be involved in high stress situations nor be sworn at and insulted by my own partner's family. This is also starting to take a toll on my mental health and my confidence.
What do you guys think about this and what advice would you give me?
TLDR: Boyfriend gets pressured by his family to not visit me, he ends up calling me suspicious for wanting to have personal time with him.
submitted by sun_shine_419 to LDR [link] [comments]

2023.06.06 01:06 couthbae My older brother has schizophrenia and I have no idea what to do anymore

For just a bit of context, he’s 5 years older than me, im 24 and he’s 29 and my family, myself and him have all been dealing with his mental disorders (schizophrenia & bipolar depression) for the better part of 10 years now. He is very against taking medication and has been through so many circumstances of forced medication (jail for homeless ppl crimes like criminal trespassing or just roaming the streets and acting unusual enough for someone to call police/ambulance and they put him in a mental hospital for the max of 2 weeks where he is medicated and he gets out and obviously does not continue treatment) he’s become naturally jaded and claims the meds are poison and insists he cannot function on them as they make him lethargic and hungry.
Thanks to this subreddit I can somewhat understand his point of view however it puts me at an extreme loss and I’m losing sight of any bright side or progression here as he does not seem to want to get better. He has no desire to do pretty much anything besides eat and smoke anything (tobacco/weed) and he’s currently not on any meds and has this chronic masturbation problem that is driving me insane (I let him use my iPad and he watches porn super loud and keeps leaving the door open despite me telling him to close it) and he pretty much doesn’t listen to anything I ask him to do unless he’s sure I’ll reward him with something to smoke or eat which makes me question whether this behavior that irritates me is part of his condition or his actual character. He’s been on the streets on and off for a long while and recently I’ve taken him in to my apartment so he currently lives with me btw.
There’s so much more to what I’ve had to deal with over all these years (quick point: he had a near successful suicide attempt my junior year of high school that pretty much derailed my entire life that year) and it takes a toll on me in several ways being his “caretaker” as I would LOVE for my brother to get better at least to where he can live by himself and be able to feed himself at the very least as it’s becoming unsustainable for me to take care of myself and another adult and still live a life I find fulfilling. I’m the only one he calls these days when he’s in the facilities and in his mind im sure im the only one he thinks he can depend on and while I’ll always be here for him, I don’t want that to be taken advantage of and he feels like he doesn’t have to do anything because I make sure he’s good. Seems unfair to me yet I feel extreme guilt when I don’t help him. Any insight or words from anybody that’s been on either end of the spectrum here would just be refreshing honestly, any piece of advice, any comments, anything at all seriously (this maybe could have also went under “Advice/Encouragement”)
Sorry for the long post but there’s truly so much to say and that’s not even touching the tip of the iceberg - I guess I’m just seeking someone besides my mother, who insists I let him fend for himself since I’m just enabling him to do nothing and my grandmother who is on the opposite end of that telling me I should take care of him…I deal with my own issues but I’m the person in the family that has to shoulder these kind of weights and I’m having trouble drawing boundaries for my own sake here
Also my very first Reddit post about something personal, scary stuff lol
submitted by couthbae to schizophrenia [link] [comments]

2023.06.05 22:01 AslandusTheLaster The one with the demon family

Original prompt: [missing] (link)
The first toll of the alarm roused me from sleep, but I missed my first bleary attempt at turning it off, leaving it blaring for thirty seconds before I managed to plunge the bedroom back into blissful silence. As I attempted to climb out of bed, I felt a pull on my shoulders.
"Nuuu..." my wife protested, "Weekend... stay.... warm..."
I looked over at her, into the four of her seven eyes that were open. Claudia was definitely a feisty one when she was awake, but waking her up properly was like trying to wake the dead.
"Hon, I would love to stay and snuggle for another hour, but the kids could be burning the house down as we speak," I said, slurring my words a bit as my brain staged its own protests against my transition into the waking world.
"Nnn..." she murmured, wrapping her arms around me further. They seemed to extend and become bulkier as she transformed from her humanoid shape into a long, ribbon-y serpentine one and coiled around my exposed torso.
I sighed, standing up with a bit more effort than usual due to the extra weight, and donned a bathrobe before heading toward the door. I could feel the ribbonlike form attached to my body falling asleep as I walked.
"Father, I require your attention," the voice of a young boy said as I stepped into the hallway.
I didn't see anyone right away, until I noticed that I had an extra shadow that didn't conform to the traditional geometry of the room.
"Percy, can this wait until daddy's had his coffee?" I asked.
"Perhaps, father, perhaps not," Percy said. He was quite eloquent for a six year old, but he did have a habit of speaking in riddles.
"Elaborate," I said, continuing down the hall. Percy followed me, still hiding my fake shadow.
"Follow me, Father, the babies need help," he said.
"Of course..." I said. "But please step back into our plane of existence, Percy, you know your mother hates it when you stay in the shadows."
"They cling to me, Father," Percy said. He did still step back through, though his raven hair did seem to stay connected to a pool of unnatural darkness.
I followed the small child back toward the kids' bedrooms, where he shoved open the door to the girls' room.
Staci was awake and coughing, and Ambrosia, the oldest of the kids, was still passed out in her bed in a form that best resembled an octopus. While I could see her jolt at the door, she quickly dozed back off.
"Staci, did you remember to take your medicine?" I asked.
"Yes..." she said, before coughing up a cluster of spiders.
"Lying is wrong, Staci," I said.
"Okay, I didn't... I thought it would be fine," she said.
I headed over and grabbed the bottle of purified salt pills off the dresser, handing her a single tablet.
"Here, unfortunately you're such a precious little angel that your demon half doesn't like to play along," I said. In reality, the girl was barely old enough to speak, and had gotten some of the most dangerous powers a demon could develop, so they needed to be suppressed with holy supplements until she was old enough to control them, but that seemed like a bit much for a three year old.
"Father, Instructor Katherine says that's a problematic stereotype," Percy said.
"Well, this is what you get when you drag me down here before I get my coffee..." I said.
"Now we must help Moloch find his head," Percy said.
"Literally?" I asked.
"Yes," Percy said.
"Of course..." I said. I followed the boy back to his room.
Ambrose, Ambrosia's twin brother, was halfway through tossing the room himself when we arrived. Moloch's body parts were swirling around in a whirlwind above his bed.
"Need help?" I asked.
"Oh, hey Dad... I think I've almost found it, just give me another minute..." Ambrose said.
"Here, let me show you a fun trick," I said. I walked over to Moloch and started tickling the toddler.
The peal of the boy's laughter rang out from the pile of blankets and pillows by the side of the room. Ambrose quickly located the head and tossed it into the whirlwind, where it joined the rest of the body parts and formed into the humanoid shape of his brother.
"Thanks Dad," Ambrose said. I gave him a thumbs up before heading out of the room. Percy slunk back into the shadows and disappeared to who-knows-where. That was a problem for later in the day.
I considered going to the kitchen and grabbing some coffee, but Claudia's semi-conscious murmuring started finding its way to my ears again. She was right, it was the weekend, and the kids could... probably manage themselves for another hour. The bed was much more inviting, and my wife wasted no time uncoiling and transforming back into her humanoid form once she felt the covers again.
Starting the day could wait just a bit longer.
submitted by AslandusTheLaster to AslandusTheLaster [link] [comments]

2023.06.05 19:02 Aggressive-Ad-957 I GOT ZILLIONS WAHOO

submitted by Aggressive-Ad-957 to bitlife [link] [comments]

2023.06.05 04:23 Volodio The fifth ruler of the new Argead dynasty

The fifth ruler of the new Argead dynasty
First ruler
Second ruler
Third ruler
Fourth ruler

Leontia (1006 – 1042)
After the death of their father, Leontia, Kyra and Aigida shared his domain. Leontia, as the oldest, she was 33, took the title of despotissa, which the others were not happy about but initially accepted when Leontia promised to work with her sisters, including Garyphallia who had not received any land. While the idea of them all taking the title of despotissa was present, like after the death of Alexandros the Judge of Men, their independence from the Eastern Roman Empire also meant they had no protection. As a result, they agreed to keep the realm united to be stronger together. This was especially motivated by the Pope in Rome who declared that the presence of so many people in Greece having renounced Jesus was a threat of Christianity. That declaration was universally seen as an announcement of incoming military actions.
In 1007, Leontia gave birth to a son named Alexandros. She had also a 2-year-old boy named Kallistos. In 1009, she had a daughter, Eudoxia. During those years, she focused on improving her domain in Attica and stabilizing the realm. Yet she did not have the diplomatic skills of her father and struggled to gain the allegiance of the nobility. Even her sisters distanced themselves from her.
In 1011, half of the Bulgarian nobles rebelled against the Argeads. Leontia sent Pankratios with 3 800 men to crush them. The conflict became very costly as supplies were hard to come by for the Greeks. In 1013, Roman nobles saw this as an opportunity and attacked the Argeads for Moesia. The despotissa hired mercenaries and called for the Myrmidons to face this new threat. The Myrmidons brought 3 000 soldiers to the ongoing Bulgarian campaign and defeated the rebels at the Battle of Zica in May, putting an end to the revolt. The vanquished were stripped of their lands and titles, given to Pankratios as a reward, and sent to a special prison to live the rest of their lives.
Meanwhile, Pankratios, with 4 700 men, defeated the 2 400 Romans at the Battle of Silistria in June. Pankratios continued the campaign and captured several forts of the noble families. In 1014, Basileus Anthimos intervened as he did not want to lose these lands. He forced the families to pay a ransom to the Argeads in exchange for the return of their cities. That year, Leontia made a deal with the nobility to give them more rights and autonomy in hope of keeping the stability of the realm. She also had another daughter, Simonis.
However, the agreement did not last as one of the nobles, duchess Lyudmila, revolted against the Argeads in 1015. The Myrmidons were once again called and their leader, Marko, led the campaign against the rebels, who had made sure they enjoyed a lot of popular support for the conflict. Marko successfully crushed the rebellion in a few weeks only, by boldly ambushing the rebels and taking all of their resources before they could organize. Lyudmila was arrested and stripped of all of her titles and lands while the other leaders were executed.
The peace lasted for some time, during which Leontia was once again able to invest into Attica, which by that point was by far the most prosperous region in the realm. Until 1018, when Leontia discovered a conspiracy where the Argeads from Cyprus were trying to peacefully add Thessalonika to their domain by switching the allegiance of the officials. The despotissa sent some men to deal with the situation, however they were murdered and then she sent an entire army to bring it into the fold before Cyprus could intervene. The officials were defeated, stripped of their ranks and Leontia began to manage Thessalonika more closely.
The next year, Leontia reorganized Rashka, which had previously belonged to Lyumlida. She created noble houses from the local Serbian population and gave them titles and lands in the region, in hope of counterbalancing the Bulgarian nobility which was causing her such trouble since the beginning of her reign. In 1020, Leontia began the construction of a grand temple in Athens in honor of the ancient Greek gods and the Argead dynasty.
In 1021, Prince Alexandros died during an accident. Leontia began to drink heavily to drown her sorrows. Yet, she also found more time and gold to work on her domains as there was peace and stability in the realm. She improved the law, the administration, the organization of the cities, the farming system, all while being fair and just. Her court was open to everyone, including commoners. Athens became so prosperous during this period as to be called “the small Constantinople”.
In 1025, Princess Eudoxia married a member of the Skleros family who were ruling in Epirus. The following year, Leontia sent 1 600 elite soldiers led by Maximos to invade Montenia, in the kingdom of Wallachia. The latter was weak and in the middle of a war. As a result, the conquest ended swiftly with a victory, at a low cost. This good news was shadowed by the death of Princess Eudoxia in childbirth. Leontia worked even more to deal with the grief, reproducing what she had done in Attica to the rest of her domains, especially the ones in the north near the Danube.
In 1029, the despotissa attacked the count of Duklja for his lands. However, he was a Catholic and because Leontia did not follow Christ, he was able to call on the Knight Templars, an order of warriors made to fight the enemies of the Catholics. The despotissa, in turn, called for the Myrmidons. In total, the Catholics had 10 700 men, while the Argeads were 11 400, under the command of Maximos. Maximos forced his enemies to split and defeated one part of their army at the Battle of Moraca in April. The Christians gathered their armies and met their enemies at Skadar in June, but they were defeated once more. The victory was complete a few months later when all the cities and forts were under Argead control.
In 1030, Princess Simonis was married to Miroslav II, a Bulgarian who had taken control of Rashka. Over the following years, the prosperity of the Argead realm increased even more under the rule of Leontia. Most of the gold was reinvested, but the despotissa also used it to increase slightly the size of the army. In 1033, Prince Kallistos married Aigida, of the Pastillas family.
In 1034, the despotissa attacked the count of Beroë who controlled the lands between the Argead-controlled Bulgaria in the north and the Eastern Roman Empire in the south. The lands had a symbolic value for they were part of the ancient kingdom of Macedon. Over 9 000 soldiers were involved in the invasion under the command of several nobles in order to make the conquest as swift as possible. It was successful as the area was completely under Argead control after a year of war. Leontia immediately got to work and helped rebuild and improve the newly conquered cities. While she was busy in Beroë, she lent 2 000 soldiers to Theognosia, a Greek woman trying to take a city from her brother, in exchange for her allegiance after the campaign.
In 1038, Leontia declared war on Basileus Anthimos. The Eastern Roman Empire, despite the loss of such a large territory with the Argead independence half a century before, had managed to hold together under the leadership of Anthimos, who was a skilled general. Leontia had had the goal to invade for several years and was waiting for an opportunity. But the Empire stayed stable and she was getting old, so she decided to attack nonetheless. Anthimos gathered 12 000 men. However, under Leontia the Argead realm had grown stronger and richer. Including the Myrmidons, she was able to rely on 15 000 soldiers for the war.
The two armies faced each other at the Battle of Smolyan in September. The Argeads, led by Viseslav, were victorious, though it was not a decisive victory. Viseslav went back in Argead territory for the winter, and then both sides started capturing the forts and cities of the other, the Argeads in Thrace and the Romans in Asia Minor. This went on until November 1040, when Anthimos led his army back to Thrace to defend his land. They fought at the Battle of Ustra. The Romans were defeated and Anthimos himself was captured during the battle. It was the decisive victory Leontia had been looking for. With the Basileus in her custody, she imposed harsh conditions on him. He was forced to give back the forts taken, while confirming the loss of the cities taken by the Argead and even giving more, including Constantinople itself.
The surrender of Constantinople was a shock to the Christian and Muslim world. For centuries it had been held by the Roman Empire without ever being captured, and for the first time it was abandoned to a foreign power. People from the time saw it as a sign of the coming end of the Eastern Roman Empire and the rise of a new power in its place.
After the war, Leontia focused on rebuilding and changing Constantinople. She planned for it to be her new capital. However, during the year 1041 she lost first her lover and then her daughter Simonis, dying in childbirth. It took a heavy toll on her and she took her own life in early 1042, at 68. Despite all of her successes, she faced a lot of loss and her mental health was definitely affected. It is believed her tendency to bury herself in work only made matters worse. She was a heavy drunkard, even for the time, and it is even surprising she lived as long as she did.
Despite her difficult early reign, Leontia managed to make the Argead realm rich and prosperous. Athens became the fourth most important city of Europe, behind Constantinople, Rome and Cordoba. She is also seen positively today for having been such a just ruler, which is not to be exaggerated by believing she was a friend of the peasants in her realm. She was still part of the elites. Her capture of Constantinople had a large impact and completely changed the balance of power between the Argeads and the Eastern Roman Empire. For all her achievements, she is seen as one of the most important women of the Middle Ages. Lastly, she is studied through her mental issues, particularly her struggles with losses and stress.

The extent of Argead's control (Hellas) in 1041
submitted by Volodio to CrusaderKings [link] [comments]

2023.06.05 02:18 dolly_gutz How do I (16f) wake my mom (48f) from her depression sleep?

Title is kinda weird. Didn’t know how else to phrase it. Tried to post in relationship advice sub but couldn’t.
Basically these past 5 years have been very tough on my family. Mom and dad fighting, threats of divorce, stuff like that. Anyways, this has taken a very deep toll on my mom. She suffers from depression and mood swings, which usually causes her to go into depression sleeps which leave her rotting in her bed for a week+, hostile to anyone around her.
She used to take antidepressants, not sure what kind, but she said she doesn’t feel like herself when she takes them so she hasn’t gotten a refill in awhile.
Whenever we (my brother(22m) and me) try to wake her up because we worry about her she yells at us to leave her alone and to shut up because we “don’t know anything”.
It really hurts my feelings because I’ve struggled with depression myself and I just want her to be happy and not in bed all the time.
My brother has gotten pretty fed up with her because she usually does this every month so he yells back at her and they get into an argument because she thinks we don’t care about her.
But I really do care, I’ve been doing all the cooking and cleaning and feeding her meals because I know she won’t feed herself. I just want my mom back, the one who spends time with us instead of telling us to go away. I try to include her in things but she always says no.
To make it worse, is that my dad is not very present. He supports us financially but he’s never at home. So we have to depend on her to go to the store for food. And trying to get her up to get food when we have nothing in the pantry is like dragging a demon out of hell. I know it sounds bad but I really try to be supportive of her and know i believe in her but I’ve exhausted all options. She’s so hostile towards us.
I think the worst part was when she missed my 16th birthday entirely. She slept through it. Not even a happy birthday. No cake, no anything, just a normal day. Maybe I’m overreacting but I though 16 was an important birthday. It really hurt me.
Anyways, I’m sorry this was so long, it’s kind of a vent post, but I’m also asking for advice. How do I get her up? How do I show her i love her so much and that I want to see her happy but she needs to get up to do that?
TLDR: My mom has depression, won’t get up to do her responsibilities and is pushing us away, how do I help her?
submitted by dolly_gutz to offmychest [link] [comments]