What is 1/6 divided by 3
NCT (Neo Culture Technology)
2014.08.21 03:57 Chidwick089 NCT (Neo Culture Technology)
This subreddit is dedicated to all subunits of the 23-member K-pop boy group NCT (엔시티 Neo Culture Technology) under SM Entertainment. Check out our Wiki or scroll down the sidebar to the 'About NCT' section to find out where to get started with the different units, members, discography, and NCT's rules. Sort by 'New' if you want to know what's happening at the moment or use the search option to find answers to your questions!
2008.03.31 21:45 /r/Vegan - the largest vegan community online!
Veganism: "A philosophy and way of living which seeks to exclude—as far as is possible and practicable—all forms of exploitation of, and cruelty to, animals for food, clothing or any other purpose; and by extension, promotes the development and use of animal-free alternatives for the benefit of animals, humans and the environment. In dietary terms it denotes the practice of dispensing with all products derived wholly or partly from animals." - The Vegan Society
2013.08.03 01:36 What Could Go Right?
A SUBREDDIT FOR UNEXPECTEDLY POSITIVE OUTCOMES.
2023.02.10 22:42 lamajigmeg Medicinal Meditation - BLOG
He told me of the more than nine years he spent on meditative retreat, and of his frustrated search to receive the teachings for a very unusual form of Pho’wa (
or forceful transference of consciousness) that would allow his mind to enter others’ bodies that he might better diagnose and heal them. Weeks elapsed and then during last night’s meditation a hack or work-around gently dawned on me. The brainstorm returned to me this morning, as I was setting up for my morning livestream. It felt like it demanded to be recorded as a Sadhana (
or spiritual practice).
It was composed during the twenty-five minutes I thought I would prepare for class, and edited (
rather slap dash) as I led the practice on line.
1) Open the practice by chanting the recitations of Bodhichitta, Refuge, as well as “Calling the Lama from Afar” and perform the five following exercises, sixteen rounds each.
2) Train in mindfulness and meditation by mounting the slogans “
Notice this…” and “
relaxing!” upon your respective inhalations and exhalations.
3) Contemplate the non-duality slogans “
they and me…” “
how NOT two?”.
4) Return to mindfulness and meditation.
5) Contemplate the love slogans “
Profound health…” “
now for ALL!”.
And 6) return again to mindfulness and meditation.
7) As your stamina builds, this cycle of exercises three through six
could be repeated for 2, 4, or even 8 sets.
8) Seal the practice by chanting the Four Immeasurables; repeat these eight steps every twelve hours and you could meditate like a Jedi
Meditation and philosophy livestream (
from a geeky perspective) every 12 hours –
https://www.Youtube.com/@lamajigmeg – linktree in profile - #love #lettinggo #meditation
Latest chanting guide and meditation text -
https://f9c79b97-0c9c-4bb3-bddf-1a943f5a54d7.filesusr.com/ugd/c5e62c_b88ce3a8994b4d438ce277ebabf82507.pdf submitted by
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2023.02.10 22:40 AutoModerator [SHARE COURSE] I Have Iman Gadzhi - Agency Navigator For Cheap
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2023.02.10 22:40 AutoModerator [WE HAVE FOR SALE] - Agency Navigator, Agency Incubator, Copy Paste Agency, 6 Figure SMMA + MORE IMAN GADZHI COURSES On www.GenkiCourses.com USE COUPON R3DDIT15OFF FOR 15% OFF
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EVERY aspect of building an agency from scratch. This is almost a plug & play system with enough success stories to back it up! Signing clients, running Facebook ads, building out your team, on-boarding clients, invoicing, sales... this course has
everything covered for you.
The content of Iman Gadzhi - Agency Navigator is :
- Agency Navigator course Core Curriculum
- Custom E-Learning Platform For Agency Owners
- Financial Planner, Revenue Calculator, Outreach Tracker & More Tools
- Websites Templates, Funnels, Ads & More
- Template Contracts, Sales Scripts, Agreements & More
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2023.02.10 22:36 PPY_Commercial_Elec How Pressure Cookers Actually Work?
2023.02.10 18:18 RpGTGEoD Transferring data to Pixel is stuck
EDIT: Some progress. It seems the Pixel was several months behind on both security and play system updates. Updating those has allowed me to progress through place where I was stuck previously, but now, once I select what data I want to transfer, it says copying data, then immediately fails to copy everything, and I can't seem to get it to actually copy. I've tried a couple different cables to no avail. New thoughts would be appreciated!
TL;DR: Trying to copy data from iPhone to Pixel 6a, keeps getting stuck preparing to copy data, tried a miriade of things to no avail, looking for suggestions if anyone's experienced something similar.
I'm not sure if anyone has a solution or thoughts to this, but I've already searched the subreddit history and haven't found anything helpful.
I'm helping someone set up their new 6a from their old iPhone SE 2, and every time I get to the "copy data" page, I get stuck. I plug the two phones in together, and it acknowledges they're connected but then when it gets to "preparing to copy" it just spins endlessly and makes no progress at all.
I've tried multiple different cables (both USB-C and A), and even factory reset both phones (then resetup the iPhone from an iCloud backup).
Obviously some data can transfer manually, but the key thing missing right now is that I have no other way to transfer their entire text message history, which is why I can't use the wireless transfer setup.
We've been working on this for the better part of 3 days and had no progress. Of course, when talking to Google support, their only suggestion is to call Apple to have them help, and obviously Apple (understandably) says to call Google, so that support loop is entirely unhelpful.
If anyone has anything to try that we maybe haven't tried yet or has dealt with something similar please let me know. I've loved Pixel for years, but for a first time user this is becoming a truly heinous experience.
Thanks for any help!
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2023.02.07 21:16 AutoModerator [SHARE COURSE] Biaheza – Full Dropshipping Course
Good day to everyone, I am selling the Biaheza Dropshipping course for a fraction of the original price (only $25)
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Link Download: https://www.genkicourses.com/product/biaheza-dropshipping-course-complete/ How I launched a multi-million dollar company from my bedroom. Unlike most courses, I do not discuss regurgitated strategies that should work “in theory” and “mindset.” Instead, we take it step by step and create a real-live dropshipping store that makes over $1,000 on its first full day of operation (profitable right from the get-go). I explain everything along the way and discuss how I plan to scale much higher from there!
THE biaheza dropshipping course FEATURES
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INTRO
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- Should You Outsource Everything?
PILLAR ONE
- Checklist for Products that Actually Sell
- Where Do You Find Winning Products?
- Revealing Products I’ve Sold in the Past
PILLAR TWO
- What Type of Store Should You Start?
- Explaining The Product We’re Choosing
- Creating a Shopify Website From Scratch Step by Step
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- Creating the Product Page Step by Step
- Importing Reviews to Product Page
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- Finished Winning TikTok Page Layout
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Everything Else
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- Conclusion
Bonus Content
- Company Social Media Pages (Very Important)
- My Full Instagram Theme Page Marketing Strategy:
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- My Full Facebook Ads Marketing Strategy
- How to Create Viral Advertisements
- Setting up Lookalike Audiences
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2023.02.07 21:13 vubs Questions about Expense Ratios and Target Date Funds
I have been confused for sometime about how expense ratios are charged with mutual fund or ETFS.
- How vanguard VOO has an expense ratio of 0.03%. Is this an annual charge of 0.03% of my money in that fund? If so, when does the charge actually happen? Let's say I don't have my money in that VOO fund the entire year am I still charged the 0.03%, even though they only managed my money for half the time?
- I have my 401k in the S&P 500 right now because the expense ratio is lower than a target date fund and I am young. But when I get older, 45-50 years of age, I want to move all my money from the S&P to the target date fund 2060. Let's say the expense ratio for that target date fund is 0.08% and I move $50,000 over. Will they instally charge me that 0.08% on the $50,000 or do they wait a year?
- This is a side question to question 3. I really do have my 401k all in the S&P 500 due to low expense ratio fees. And plan on keeping it there till I am older and then moving it to the target date fund where it will lower my risk. Is this a good or bad move? Am I hurting my funds by not having it in the target date fund now? I really don't see why I would put it in the target date fund if the S&P has cheaper fees and gets similar or better returns than the target date fund.
Please give me some insight on how these Fund Expenses are charged to me when using them.
Thank you!
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2023.02.07 21:11 SuperHotUKDeals Amazon Basics 128 GB, USB 3.1 Flash Drive, Read Speed up to 130 MB/s - £9.89 @ Amazon
The following description is not provided by this sub or any of its contributors.
£9.89 - Amazon - ULTRA FAST: Read speed up to 130mb/s and data transfer up to 15 times faster than standard USB 2.0 flash drives; You can transfer a full-length movie in less than 40 seconds
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This deal can be found on hotukdeals via this link: https://ift.tt/wdzWlsE
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2023.02.07 21:09 GestaltTherapist 2013/04/17 10:00-17:00 Pocklington, East Yorkshire.
This CPD is open to trainee and qualified psychotherapists/psychotherapeutic counsellors
We are delighted to be offering again the Constellations CPD day at NESTT, Pocklington, East Yorkshire.
Whilst this will take a similar format to the previous training day, there will be significant opportunity to practise the process. Therefore, it is useful to both to new delegates and those who attended the previous session
Family Constellations was originally devised by Bert Hellinger as group work and has since been adapted to fit into the one-to -one model of therapeutic work with clients.
Constellations owes much to systems theory, and was originally termed by Hellinger, ‘The Orders of Love’. It works by reproducing relational patterns spatially, and allowing space for what ‘needs to happen’ through movement and the process of unfolding. Both therapist and client can gain new insights into recurring relational issues.
Barbara will demonstrate constellations followed by time as a group for reflection on the overall technique. There will then be time for participants to try this method for themselves in break-out groups.
The facilitators:
Barbara Webb, qualified in Psychosynthesis Psychotherapy 25 years ago and subsequently trained with Albrecht Mahr in constellation work. Now retired, she enjoys introducing constellations to others; she sees it as a powerful yet sensitive therapeutic technique able to undo ‘entanglements’ in relationships, provide new insights in ‘stuck’ situations which can, potentially, enhance awareness, direction and movement within the therapeutic relationship.
Lydia Noor is a co-founder of NESTT CIC where we run clinical services, course for working with children and their families, as well as a CPD programme. Lydia is also course leader for the Diploma in Relational Integrative Psychotherapy at SCPTI. Lydia is interested in creativity which enhances awareness within the therapeutic relationship. She has experience of participating in both group and individual constellations and finds the unfolding of intergenerational patterns of relating to be a powerful process. Lydia has over 20 years’ experience of psychotherapy with adults in Pocklington where she lives and works.
Please let us know any accessibility needs so that, wherever possible, the space, content and resources can be amended accordingly.
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2023.02.07 21:07 wirecatz "No show" appointment reason for chargeback?
Sorry if this is super wordy. Including all details because I feel like I'm going crazy.
Last year I went to psychotherapy for a couple months through a telehealth service. I found a small organization and therapist who seemed to specialize in what I was dealing with and had good recommendations. It cost $150 per 45 minute session. Conducted by phone weekly.
One of the sessions was scheduled in the middle of the day so I had to take off work. Never received a phone call. After 15 minutes I emailed asking what had happened and if we could reschedule. A full hour after the appointment time he replied saying he had called once, and offered a reschedule time the next week. Also let me know if that happened again he would drop me, essentially. I sent a screenshot of my call history, including missed work calls, but nothing from him. No reply, I thought we had an understanding.
He later charged my card full cost for a "no show." I sent him an email explaining that I didn't think it was reasonable, I did everything I could have, used vacation, etc. He sent a somewhat condescending email back about how I should make sure my spam filter is off (it is, I work in IT. No other issue with his calls.) and I should call him if he doesn't call me after 10 minutes. I did not know this was possible, as he relays through an out of state service. Also, it seems like only trying once is kind of ridiculous. He clearly wasn't devoting the time to me since my email went unanswered until after the session should have ended. He refused to discuss billing further outside our appointment time.
At this point I also cancel further meetings since I felt a bit taken advantage of, and lay out my final case. He responds that he understands. But no refund. After a month, I call and leave a message with the parent organization and it is forwarded to him.. He plays dumb saying "I understand you have further billing questions?" and once again ignores my reply. This was almost a month ago.
The documents I signed specify I am financially responsible for no shows or late cancels, but doesn't define those terms. It definitely doesn't say I'm responsible for all technical issues on either end, or what my options are if I don't get a call.
Is that a valid case for chargeback? I don't want to be a jerk, but that $150 means a lot to my family right now.
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2023.02.07 21:06 theonefitreddituser A lens of focal length 5 cm is being used by a student in the laboratory as a magnifying glass. His least distance of distinct vision is 25cm. What magnification is the student getting.
I have a debate with my physics teacher about if 25 is the image distance or the object distance. Online different sources have different answers all reputable sources.
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2023.02.07 21:05 KageKyoshin [PC] 🌐 CHEAPEST GTA ONLINE MODDING SERVICE [RECOVERY] 💲 [250+ VERIFIED CUSTOMERS] [EXCLUSIVE BONUSES FOR NEW CUSTOMERS][ LATEST PATCH 1.66 SECURITY UPDATE & LOS SANTOS DRUG WARS UPDATE] [FEBRUARY 2023][EXCLUSIVE DLC UNLOCKS INCLUDED][BAN WARRANTY]
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2023.02.07 21:04 IDSM13 Difference between seeing a PCP vs a psychiatrist for your medication?
I’ve always seen a regular primary care doctor for my medication for the last 13+ years. My doctor recently retired and the new doctor who took over my care does not feel comfortable prescribing adderall and referred me to a psychiatrist.
What’s the difference in seeing a psychiatrist? Is it expected to be a full hour session similar to a therapy session or are you in and out relatively fast? (I’ve seen therapists before for CBT, but never a psychiatrist, so excuse my ignorance on this). Are psychiatrists in the US able to write the RX for longer instead of the 3 months a PCP doctor can write?
If by chance, anyone lives in the Las Vegas area can send me a recommendation on a PCP or psychiatrist I’d be very appreciative!
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2023.02.07 21:03 Roloroma_Ghost Can the Targon be a World Rune?
I mean, if you look at them, the shape and the "energy focus" ability are the same between runes from "Call of Power" and an official Targon art. Also there are enormous amount of magic and "mind control" by the sheer power what they give to the people.
This is a long shot, but...
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2023.02.07 21:02 mgegv Psychedelics "ego reaffirming"
Context: someone on reddit once told me that LSD has this "ego reaffirming" effect. I asked him what he means by that because it's "a concept" I once thought about (I'll explain it later), and he said:
"In my experience if I want to reinforce things I believe about the world or increase my level of self centeredness I would use acid. If I want to change my mind about things and make me less self centered I'd use mushrooms.
Another thing I've noticed is on the come down of acid I'm very self critical while on mushrooms I'm more at peace. Idk if any of that is related though."
And then I replied this but he didn't reply back (probably bc it was too much lmao) so I hope you guys could help me with this 🌝:
I started doing psychedelics from the documentary "How to change your mind" (all about psychedelic therapy) so I was planning –self– treating the PTSD and OCD I've had since childhood since I had no means to find a better clinical approach or with actual psychedelic therapists. So as I didn't find shrooms or acid in my area, I started off with MDMA, integration; daily meditation, journaling and some background on psychology I have.
I literally cured my PTSD. It literally happened. My whole nervous system doesn't remember anymore ever being abused and I don't react to my triggers anymore. But my OCD got incredibly worse. And my theory was MDMA strengthened my ego which a the moment was essential for treating my PTSD, but there's some mental illnesses such as OCD or eating disorders I believe are tightly related to egoistic beliefs, the ego in general, a damaged ego. So now I basically wanted to kill it or dissolve it.
I didn't ever share this with anyone or found anything related on the internet. Then I finally found shrooms, altered my whole life and changed my perspective on EVERYTHING. Cured my OCD. I feel free today more than ever of any kind of pain, past wounds, anxiety or weird fixations. But now... I don't know what to do with my life in any sense. I doubt what I like, interests and passions, I feel more connected to myself than ever, but less connected with the stuff I used to relate with me, including dreams, goals, even music taste, my artistic taste in general, as if all my life was a lie, but I remember genuinely enjoying all this stuff, and didn't copy this "personality" from anyone I was even considered weird among my peers for my artistic taste and hobbies. They lost a lot of sense if not all and although it doesn't feel scary I don't want to feel this way. Now I want to go live my life as I never did before bc of my past mental state. I want my ambitions back (I used to have good ones where I am really skilled) because yeah I need to feed myself, I'm only 23, now I still like a bunch of different stuff but everything means and feels so ambiguous and "not me". So, I was thinking based on everything I've read "maybe acid can help me with this" to redifine my paths, identify, and passions...
And this "ego reaffirming" logic really makes me believe it could work idk, I feel that "I don't care about my success" more than what I'd like, I need to make strong plans and take strong decisions real soon and I'm like "whatever" and I don't like it... it's been 1 month since I took that heroic dose of shrooms and this doesn't go away. As if I lost my identity. What are your thoughts now based on this context?
Sorry if it's too much or too confusing guys. I appreciate anything you may suggest :)
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2023.02.07 21:01 jnorton_98 Who would win the hunger games out of the Three Houses Cast
District 1: Edelgard and Hubert
District 2: Claude and Hilda
District 3: Dedue and Ingrid (Dedue volunteered for Dimitri)
District 4: Petra and Sylvain
District 5: Ferdinand and Bernadetta
District 6: Felix and Annette
District 7: Caspar and Leonie
District 8: Mercedes and Lindhart
District 9: Lysithea and Yuri
District 10: Balthus and Hapi
District 11: Marianne and Ignatz
District 12: Ashe and Dorthea
(I didn't put much thought into the districts, so feel free to ignore them lol)
Personally, I feel like Petra could take the whole thing. Claude might have enough schemes to make it to the end, but I don't think he would win. Bernadetta and Lindhart I could see stepping off the platform early. Ignatz is one of the first to go. Sylvain takes on a sort of Finnick role. Ferdinand would be too proud, and that would get him killed. The Capitol would love Dorthea, so she would get lots of outside help.
(Why do I kinda want to write this as an AU...but I'm lazy so probably won't.)
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2023.02.07 21:00 AutoModerator [SHARE COURSE] Montell Gordon – Agency Transmutation
Agency Transmutation Beta Access [Week 1-3] – Montell Gordon Link Download: h
ttps://www.genkicourses.com/product/montell-gordon-agency-transmutation/ Agency Transmutation Beta Access Information Agency Transmutation is an expertly crafted, 6-week long program that includes everything you could ever need in order to successfully scale your very own social media marketing agency from $0 to $10k/pm even if you are a complete beginner and have zero past experience or sales abilities.
The program comes with 35+ hours of expert training, an exclusive, members-only community full of winners, and all the scripts, templates, contracts, agreements, resources, and plug & play sheets you’ll ever need.
The program also included a special bonus section of 10+ hours of live recorded coaching calls and access to Montell live through monthly Q&A calls hosted on Zoom.
This deadly combination of training, community and resources means you’ll be on the fast track to successfully scaling your agency to $10k per month using the ‘Hybrid System’.
In simple terms… Agency Transmutation is Montell Gordon’s brand-new, cutting-edge 6-week online program that teaches agency owners to scale to $10k+ with a heavy emphasis on teaching lead sourcing and establishing consistent outreach systems.
Something that is notoriously skipped over by most teachers in the SMMA space!
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2023.02.07 20:59 bikesrgood Inbound vs outbound channel differences
Sorry still a noob.
- If I open a channel I have X outbound capacity to a node and 0 inbound capacity.
- If I then send a payment of example 50% of X, I then have 50% outbound and 50% inbound capacity right? This is what I see on my channel status on my node. Each channel has local and remote balance and the sum of those is is the outbound and inbound capacities respectively.
So when I first created a channel and I read about getting inbound capacity, I thought no problem there, get someone to open a channel to me. But then I thought I had to open a channel to them as well. That seems like the right way to get outbound capacity. However, as I've sent and received some payments, I see both channels now have local and remote balances, each adding to the inbound and outbound capacity.
So my question is, instead of trying to get inbound capacity somewhere by having them open a channel to you, couldn't you just create an outbound capacity and then send a payment to another wallet you own over that channel? What is the difference between having them open a channel and myself opening a channel in terms of the inbound and outbound capacity of the node? Was I mistaken that I needed to open a channel to a node that opens a channel to me? Is this just a redundant channel not really serving a purpose now? Maybe I should close that one and open a channel to some other node.
So many questions lol
EDIT. I guess paying your own invoice on a channel is just rebalancing. So really my question is whether or not it' s necessary to open an outbound channel to nodes that you have inbound channels with. Etiquette? who's in charge of rebalancing a channel? Either party?
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2023.02.07 20:58 UndulatingTunamelt The Importance of Giving Voice to Criticism & Doubt in a Respectful & Constructive Way
The following is a comment (with a follow-up comment) that I left for someone on
therapyabuse a few months ago. I repost it, here, to further encourage open dialogue about TEAM CBT and Dr. David Burns. TEAM CBT is all about critical thinking, compassion, and understanding. We employ these with our own thoughts and, respectfully, with the thoughts of others. It's a reminder to never blindly accept what is put before us. If you have doubts, they deserve to be heard. This habit will strengthen those beliefs that serve you well, and guard against those that don't. Dr. Burns himself often tells his readers to question him, to question everything. If something is solid, it will stand up to whatever you throw at it.
HERE IS THE REPOST:
Full disclosure: I've read FEEING GREAT more than a dozen times, and his other books multiple times, as well. I listen to the podcast every week. I've been through the FEELING GREAT BOOK CLUB twice (a 3-month long, once-weekly zoom group hosted by 2 TEAM-certified therapists). I'm even signed up to be a small group facilitator in the upcoming September book club, and I host a TEAM CBT Facebook Support/Practice Group. It's been a big part of my life for the past couple of years.
All that said, I have heaps of criticism for Dr. Burns. Many of the things he says make a lot of sense to me, but many things I disagree with or have serious doubts about, so much so that I may give notice to drop out of the aforementioned book club facilitator role before it begins. A big part of my misgivings is just as you said, taking issue with the tone of ableism and privilege, as well as advising people against certain potentially life-saving medications. I've also heard/read him tell stories of interventions with patients that I found ethically-questionable, such as the time when he insisted a patient rub her hands on the inside of a gooey garbage bin, then wipe her hands on her face, to cure her of germ phobia.
Listening to the podcasts, you get an even less inhibited view into the mind of Dr. Burns. He frequently says things that are unprofessional, shocking, rude, or downright bizarre. More than once his cohost has chided him, "David! You can't say that." He got into such a conflict with his first cohost, that he left the show. When interviewing guests that he disagrees with, Dr. Burns is often very critical and rude. Lately, I've found him to be especially rude to listeners who have written in with innocent and polite questions. In podcast #299 (44:10), he described an incident at home, when he was "pooping" on the upstairs toilet. Before getting up to look for toilet paper, he said "I squeezed my butt cheeks together so nothing would drip on the floor."
My sense is that he's "losing it." In fact, he often says he's getting "old and senile." He's 80-something-year-old now. I think it explains his failing filter, but he's always been a little unfiltered. He does apologize pretty often for his gaffes. Sometimes it's sincere, but sometimes it seems to me that he's just sorry the other person is offended (a non-apology). He often says that he has little patience for small talk and "annoying questions." He's also obsessed with the ideas of "enlightenment," euphoria, and the "single session cure." I don't know why he feels the need for so much hyperbole, but I suspect it has to with his growing certainly that TEAM CBT is some sort of spiritual truth (though he stops short of saying it so directly). He feels that a lot of his ideas will change the course of psychology and perhaps the world. I don't get the sense that he's a con artist. I believe he's genuinely sincere, a true believer. (He cries every time he brings up Ludwig Wittgenstein, because he had such amazing insights, but no one believed him.)
Considering how he believes ADHD isn't a real thing, I sense strong ADHD vibes from him, as well as ASD (autism). These are very real things that I've been diagnosed with. I feel I have a good radar for it in others, and the more I read/listen to him, the more I see it. Of course, this doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it does explain a lot. I think he has a legitimately brilliant mind, and I value quite a lot of the tools and concepts he developed. But he's also got serious cognitive bias going on with his bad ideas, and his cognitive inflexibility doesn't allow him to examine them objectively. I understand this is quite common with genius. Some of the biggest minds in history had some pretty wacky beliefs outside of their legitimate contributions.
TEAM CBT has a lot going for it. Thankfully, Dr. Burns isn't the only one promoting it. There's an entire Feeling Good Institute dedicated to training and certifying TEAM therapists (with his blessing but not his oversight). Of the most prominent TEAM therapists I've heard speak, they're definitely much gentler than David and non-offensive/demanding. They seem to have taken the best parts of his material and left behind the bad. This is encouraging. Hopefully, Dr. Burns doesn't do too much more damage to TEAM in his later years. Letting him do an off-the-cuff podcast probably isn't a great idea. At least books can be edited. But even so, as you pointed out, this hasn't prevented him from coming across like an asshole!
So, to make a short story long, I'm probably not going to do the book club this September. I've been withdrawing from the TEAM scene lately, anyway, because of my concerns with the image Dr. Burns is giving the whole thing. I still intend to keep everything that has been of value to me. I'm hoping that TEAM CBT will continue to evolve as a modality, but in the sensible and respectful direction that the Institute's best graduates will likely take it, especially when Dr. Burns fades from the scene.
HERE IS THE FOLLOW-UP I POSTED TO THE ABOVE:
I also don't want to be uncharitable, because he may well be autistic. I don't defend bad behavior—and he himself is good to agree, when his behavior is explained to him—but I do feel compelled to defend autistics in general, when their behavior is assumed to be malicious. As I'm sure you know, we autistics are too often misunderstood. We see the world in ways that others may think odd or sometimes inappropriate; we have issues with emotional regulation and executive function. I think it's important to take responsibility for one's dragon, but not to blame oneself for the dragon overwhelms our authority and does what dragons do. Responsibility and self-blame are two very different things, I'm starting to realize.
David Burns is a good man. Of this I'm certain. He has done a lot of good in the world. If he has done any bad, it has been innocently and obliviously. He has the flaws of any man, but unfortunately there are many who see his autistic traits as flaws as well (including himself). If he was just a regular guy, living a quiet life, he would be seen as eccentric and opinionated, at times, but also someone who genuinely cares for other people and likes to laugh and play with his cats. But this isn't his life. He lives in the spotlight, writing books and teaching and doing workshops. Again, no excuse, but when we autistics take on too much, our already clumsy emotional regulation and executive function gets clumsier. We say and do things that we may know are inappropriate and rude, but mostly don't even realize. We lose control over our dragon. (Isn't it really just a free-range dragon at all times, anyway? What's a leash? Never heard of it.)
All the things I said about David Burns are true. But they're also things he's aware of. They're things that others have pointed out to him; they're things he's made an effort to improve. As I said, he apologizes frequently for his mistakes—especially as he gets older. He thanks others for showing him when he's messed up. Of course, he continues to make the same mistakes. And he apologizes again. He's actually pretty gracious about it, most of the time, which is something I admire, because as an autistic, I know all too well the pain of constantly screwing up and constantly being told so and constantly apologizing. Sometimes I feel like all I ever do is apologize. Sometimes I feel so much resentment towards neurotypicals for picking apart every little thing I say and do and seeing it all as wrong and intentional. (I thought autistics were supposed to be the nitpicky, oversensitive ones!) It's exhausting and demoralizing. We internalize every criticism and character attack and believe we're defective, broken, irreparable. We start out social (sometimes) and withdraw, because if no one interacts with us, no one gets upset and no apologies are necessary.
You can see this in Dr. Burns' work: All his worksheets and analyses, all the methods he's created—they're a socially-inept and confused autistic's mission to understand how to get along in a world that's optimized for those to whom it comes naturally. Overachievers, perfectionists, and the chronically misunderstood are drawn to his work. But others look at all the worksheets and think, "This is ridiculous." I get it. I write and journal constantly. I've done soooo many worksheets. I hate it, but I get it, because I grew up being made to feel broken and weird and inappropriate, and I want to believe that I can make myself better somehow if I think at it enough.
One of the things I like about Feeling Great (the newest book) is that it doesn't make you feel broken. Again and again, he makes the point that your negative feelings aren't wrong or invalid. He advises the reader against trying to eliminate them, but to examine what it is they're telling us that's important, and only after we can see the value in them, to decide what would be a lower level to set them at that would allow us to feel better, while still preserving their benefits. He calls this Positive Reframing, which sounds like Positive Thinking, but really isn't the same thing. (He often rails against "toxic positivity.") Instead, he suggests learning to think in "shades of gray." Life is complicated. Everything is NOT going to be okay. But everything is not going to be terrible, either.
As someone prone to "Black and White Thinking," I need this message. As someone with a weak working memory and executive function issues, I benefit from doing worksheets and journaling. It's not something I do all the time, but it can get me unstuck when I'm in a hole. Of course, my perfectionism insists I do EVERYTHING I can possible do, to nail every technique in the book like it's my job. But that only gets me stuck again, stuck in my head. Then I have to remind myself, "It's not All-or-Nothing. Good enough is enough."
I grew up being made to feel broken. It's an experience nearly every autistic person has. We only learn later that we're different, not defective. Not better, not worse (I have no energy left for these meaningless contests of worth)—different! I think that's why I have a special place in my heart for David Burns. His experience reminds me to be kinder to myself when I offend others, when I behave obliviously in ways that others misinterpret as rude. It also reminds me to be more charitable towards other autistics, when they offend. (One criticism of the modern autistic community is that we can be brutally critical and downright abusive towards each other sometimes—likely a consequence of our social-emotional challenges and tendency toward cognitive inflexibility.)
I'm sorry if all this seems like a contradiction to my previous reply. My mind is a tangle of contradictions. It's unavoidable lol. I had hoped to give your original post a nuanced response that validated all of your concerns and criticisms, while conveying my own similar but occasionally dissimilar impressions as well. I hope I haven't made things more confusing. I hope you feel that I value and agree with your criticisms. (Not just, "I'm sorry you feel this way," but "I totally get why you're horrified and angry, and that is appropriate and rational.") This is actually one of the most valuable lessons I've learned from Dr. Burns, being able to agree with someone's criticisms and anger—not just that they feel that way, but truly understanding and appreciating and validating it—and then sharing your own perspective in a non-judgmental way. Granted, Dr. Burns really fails at this again and again and again, when he talks down to people, fails to consider their circumstances, etc. His autism doesn't give him a pass. But it does put his frequent errors into perspective, and I think makes his insights and perseverance all the more significant, because he's aware of his failures, but also often oblivious to them, but also really wants to be more aware, because he does care and he does want to improve his relationships with those close to him and with the wider world. It's a struggle I can relate to.
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2023.02.07 20:58 Ultimatwo Vague offseason recap show: Seahawks "rebuild" year 1.
Year one for the new head coach of the Seahawks was a surprise. A playoff run led by Drew Lock, winning the NFC West, a great free agency, and a mediocre draft. Lets start with the Standings.
Seahawks: 12-5
Cardinals: 8-9
49ers: 7-10
Rams: 5-12.
The Seahawks were the 3 seed going into the playoffs and won in the wildcard against the Buccaneers, with a final of 26-7.
In the Divisional, the hawks played the 5 seed panthers, where they lost 21-17.
In terms of roster changes, the Seahawks made a move for Baker Mayfield this offseason, hoping he'll do what Lock couldn't, and get this franchise a super bowl.
The Seahawks signed Payne to boost the defensive line, and got a solid wide receiver in Smith-Schuster.
In the draft, they drafted another defensive tackle to further improve the front seven.
Can the Seahawks go further than last year and win it all? We'll have to see, in the next season.
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2023.02.07 20:57 asummerafternoon [Real] (08/02/2022)
Today i cried in the morning and slept till 2 pm and also talked to random people on internet. Tried installing bumble and making my account but deleted it twice. I have no energy left to swipe again start with conversations again.Texted my ex "ugly". I called P and just casually naked video called him. But after this i became more sad and blamed him for not accepting me as his girlfriend. Meanwhile my friends decided to plan a trip to Bhopal, i want to have sex with someone but i am not sure who. I am a virgin. I have a strong love for G and wanted to meet him, but now he has started not liking me from the day he came to know that i met P. I decided to meet him i am so much in desire of him that i want to meet him and am willing to travel 28 hrs by train, but my parents won't allow, I don't earn and i have no money. Sri ganganagar is where he stays, so very far. Lmba intezaar milne ke liye. Tb tk shayad uska Mann bhi na ho phir. Bohot lmba intezaar. I texted him that one day when I have money for flight i will come and meet him. I have hurt G. I hurt P, but i have done enough for him. Came to know S admission has been accepted in some Foreign University.
My school prep is not very strong. Mummy hates me w the same intensity. I have not saved my brother from failing. Tomorrow is his maths exam i d k what he will write.
My mom earns 5000rs and for this job she wakes up at 5:30 makes breakfast catches a train by 6:20 and come back home at 3:30pm. It is her secret. I lie to everyone that she is a teacher but she just keep entries at a small clinic.
I will try to write here everything i did before sleeping.
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